Geekayhej

ELEVEN!!

2011-11-11T16:30:00.002+08:00

Today is a special day,

it's 11/11/11!

I missed out this morning's 11/11/11 11:11 am so I'm gonna make a wish at 11/11/11 11:11 pm!

HEHEHEE.

#random! follow me at twitter @kwanghoe !

worries, contradictions, problems, stress..

2011-02-25T17:08:00.003+08:00

I really wonder what is life suppose to be.. People say "When life gives you lemon, make lemonade out of them." It's definitely easy to say but of course, difficult to do. Action speaks louder than words.. We, human beings, only knows how to say but don't know how to really take action towards what we promise. We only know how to give us perfunctory answers and escape from reality and stay in our lairs for almost forever, you can avoid something for life but it will bother you for life and swallow you up slowly, bits by bits, pieces by pieces then someday later, you'll feel guilty for everything, feel bad and starts to face this cruel society but the point is, does it still matter anymore by that time? Everything's too late already..

People used to say "What hurts us the most is actually Reality."

There's just too much things bothering me right now and I can't seem to get rid of them in any time.. I wish I could so badly but all I can do is just worry, sit there and do nothing about it. I am going crazy soon.. most probably? I feel so terribly guilty. I wish I can go back in time but I can't. I can't stand it, stress is killing me too. Overloaded already but I'm fine as long as it keeps me busy..

I just feel like spitting it out and I feel 1% better now.. I'm left with myself now.. I guess.

请你保佑我!!! Amitofo!!

Express yourself.

2011-02-16T19:38:00.003+08:00

I couldn't utter a single world,

I couldn't say anything,

Tears just fall and fall and fall,

Despite how I wish they would just stop.

I've always feel like this and in reality, there's really no one I can spit everything to..

/xx.

Paradox.

2011-02-01T16:34:00.004+08:00

It's the first day of February today! Hello February! Please be nice to me tQ :D I love you from January to December!

Today is a special & memorable day... and I wanted to blog about it so that I can remember.. that is..

I had lunch with the principal today. :D

It was really awkward and stressful but then me, nong and mich survived throughout the whole time! Teehee. We whispered softly when we wanted to talk something that's not suitable to be heard :p And the teacher beside me kept asking me to eat this and that, she's nice! ;) and she asked us not to be so shy HAHA. Everyone was friendly ~ :D

It's my last year and I'm happy to have such an unforgettable experience! :p tell me who can have a chance to eat with principal? HAHA. I'm so lucky!

Ambition talk with mich and jane at ICC today. I'm hesitated with my decision already.. somehow, I wanted to go somewhere far away from Brunei to study.. Deciding for the future is tough :( I don't know where to go, mummy has been worrying about this lately cause she kept asking me..

p/s; someone ditched me today! LOL. FML. :)

THE END.

2011, a great start?

2011-01-30T14:29:00.008+08:00

Ohaiyo, Konichiwa, Anyonghasaeyo, Bonjour, Ni hao, Hello ~ :D

*trying to be international*

*blush* I'm back! I know I said I'm going on a hiatus (shut up harris!) but it seems like I've changed my mind, I might update my blog once in a month or twice in a month from now but please don't put your hopes high on me because I'm a plain lazy girl who blogs when she has the urge to do so only. :p

So.. how was everyone's 2011? The first month of 2011 seems to end soon and CNY is coming ahead already. Has everyone prepare yet? I'm not traveling this CNY but I hope I'll have a long, far getaway at the end of this year with my family! After my Os of course.. :) because it would be a stress free trip, a relaxing one, hopefully, cousins will tag along too! It would be fun.

Many things will change this year for me.. there will be a drastic change, somehow, it burdens me a lot because I'm a person who worries about this and that, my problems and worries can only be solved by myself, I've never seek for help. I know people can't help me so I'd rather keep it all to myself. I put on a big big smile, but inside, I'm dying. Sometimes, everything gets out of hand and that's the time when I'm really tired of everything so please don't ask me why.

January has been a hectic busy month for me and I think the next 9 months will be the same too. I haven't even start my tuition and I already felt like I'm running out of time!

Let me recall of what had happened in January,

- I've met my cousin's fiancee, she's chinese-indon. She's pretty :) That night was the funniest family gathering ever as it's been a long time since we had a family gathering.

- Munch on countless of Famous Amos packets of cookies, it was tasty.

- Had dancing practices again. :(

- Kept on going for food shopping with mummy.

- Lost a few kgs! :D

- Done all my homework on my own. I'm so proud! =D

- Sick! Flu, cough, sore throat and fever attacked me all at once recently :( weak antibodies.

- Got a ring written "love" from Jane (L)

- Wrote a chinese script to represent school to publish as a book! *proud*

- Got interviewed in school and published on newspaper! I was speechless that time! =p

- Watched Khuntoria and finished it within 2-3 days.

- Chose between love and friend. :/

- Loves to do *doong doong* with Jane!

Maybe there's more? But that's all I can remember. I have pictures but I'm not bothered to post it up, it's raining now, so the internet connection might be slow :p Because I'm forgetful, so I always bring my camera along with me, to snap pictures as memories cause I don't wanna forget a single thing..

Reaching school before 6:20am is scary because it's dark, the corridor's dark too.. and you see stray cats wandering around and I got chased by one early in the morning, luckily no one was there cause I screamed a bit! I hate cats.. Yeah, I go to school early everyday because mommy hates traffic, my cousins too! It's runs in the blood in our family. And it seems like no matter what you do, our class seems hopeless already. It's been almost 10 years and yet they never change, I wonder how did they manage to do it. Luckily I'm used to it already as I've been with them for so long HAHA! :D

I'll cherish every single moment I still have.. but currently, I have a lot of wishes.. miracle, please come to me soon. I'm waiting for you..

Good bye everyone! :)

I wish you all a very Happy Chinese New Year! Let's welcome Rabbit year =B

Hi 2011. :)

2010-12-31T21:11:00.008+08:00

Hi readers :)

It's the last day of 2010 today and I'm here blogging.. this will be last post till 2011 ends! :) WOW. I wonder how fast will 2011 ends either :P I can't believe it's a new year already TOMORROW.

I wish everyone a happy new year! :D

I'm gonna start all over again..

My new exciting life is loading!

2 more hours and 2010 ends. No words can describe how I'm feeling right now, unexplainable feelings.. no suitable words suits my feelings! lack of words ~

Many unexpected things happened this year. I guess.. most of it is a good stuff? This year.. I learned a lot about life. It's not as easy as what I thought, begin everything from the bottom.

In 2010,

1) I failed for the first time :(

2) I joined dancing competition and got no1. (what the heck is in my mind?! but I didn't regret!)

3) I joined Science blah blah competition and got no1. :D

4) I joined Malay Speech Competition.

5) I fall in love. :)

6) I lost a few kilos (a good achievement!!)

7) I joined Badminton competition and won a medal. (HAHAHA, so unbelievable!)

8) First M & H :P

And a lot more but I forgot already.. after all, this year has been a really nice year after all. Not too bad to me.. so I'm hoping 2011 will be nice to me. Thank you everyone for the memories especially F4Sci :) The noisiest class ever but I'm so glad that I spend it with you all. I have no regrets. And most of all, I met someone I never knew I would fall for! Thank you for making this year special and memorable baby. I love you too! :) xoxo.

There will be a lot to list for my 2011 resolution and I'd rather keep it to myself this year.

A short getaway again tomorrow! Got $$ from beloved daddy. TQ daddy :D

I WISH YOU ALL,

A HAPPY NEW YEAR :)

May all your days is filled with happiness ~

I love you 2010, thank for the memories.

ps; I cut my hair short :(

pps; da yi ma came today! make my last day of 2010 even more memorable cause I was suffering the pain for hours! fml. :D

Goodnight & Goodbye 2010! Hello 2011.

Sorry that I loved you.

2010-12-30T13:03:00.004+08:00

Hi readers!

This is 700th post! I've been blogging for 3 years and I've only reach 700 post so far, so lousy right! Tomorrow is the last day of 2010 already. So fast! This year, seems to end quite fast.. for me. Next year, O lvl. :( No party, no fun, no enjoy, just study and tuition all the way. In fact, school is reopening soon, in like, 3 more days? Yeah, faster 2012 better. HAHAHA :P

Had a short getaway yesterday. It was okay and fun :)

my favourite! (L)

Hi messy closet, mommy's gonna clean you up after blogging :)

Yeah, cause maid is still not familiar with whose clothes is whose so she just put it on the table and I'm like just throwing it into my closet and when it piles up into mountain, I'm just bothered to tidy it up. Lazy ass. :(

2010.. has been a really exciting year for me. I'll update again tomorrow and it's gonna be my last post until O level ends! :)

always forgetting what to blog, roarrr.

the end.

Tell me the truth.

2010-12-28T20:19:00.004+08:00

Hi readers :)

Guess who ditch her blog again? It's ME :D So proud, lol, kidding. So I've been going out lately around Brunei, shop shop & shop. Went to Time Square today in a sudden and baby today work at there too, talk about coincidence. And I was wearing a tee, hawaii pants with slippers, messy hair and pin up.. HAHAHA. I feel so awkward going out wearing like that :(

After walking around, sisters went to Best Eastern and bought books. After that, they wanted to try "Each A Cup." So we walked there then I received a message from baby and he said he bought the drink and it's lauya. Haha! But when I ordered, I think it was okay.. Mommy knows the owner's mum and she was helping her daughter to take care of the shop.. so they had their woman talks. And the owner's brother asked us for our opinion and I said it's okay HAHA. Try their chocolate oreo, not bad :p Then we went home!

Before I blog, I'm like.. "okay, I'm gonna blog about this, this and this! yes! this will make a totally awesome blog post ever." And when I came to Blogger.com.. guess what? My mind turns blank, like whatever's on my mind, *poof* And I'm like trying to think back what I'm supposed to blog again. Does this happens to you guys too? Forgetful sucks. :(

I want to lose 5 more kilos :) Miracle, you love me right? God, you love me too right? Please make my wish come true, thank you ~

And the other day, someone got mad at me! His such a meanie. :( Now he knows whats the consequences for getting mad at me. :p MWAHAHAHAHA.

Who won't get fat? :(

Long leh? I'm cutting it soon, before school reopen.. say byebye to long hair :(

p/s: this was taken right after I bath so my hair's still wet! teehee.

Then I spot a Japanese cute kawaii girl in the kitchen! *pinch* I love bun hairs!

Oh, I was thinking of tying braids to school on the first day, should I? But if I cut short hair already, can tie braids meh?

Miri tomorrow.. hunting for new shoes and novels :) Don't know if I should buy a new bag for next year cause, my bag is not even 1 year old yet. And I don't wanna waste! So, maybe I'll just stay with my current pink starry bag :)

The end. :D

xoxo.

2010-12-24T22:35:00.000+08:00

Merry Christmas Eve everyone! :)

Wants to see you again.

2010-12-23T21:41:00.004+08:00

Hey. :)

It's been some time since I last blog. Been lazy & busy, had ups and downs. Many things happened during the days I didn't blog, couldn't really recall but I'm sure there's a lot :)

And, finally, maid arrived today! No more fml. She arrived before 7.30pm. I am so happy cause I don't have to do house work anymore! I thought she's coming after Christmas! I even went to the doctor's place cause of rashes.. Doctor said, "Don't touch chemical stuffs or those detergents, try to avoid it." But mummy keeps on insisting that it's the laptop's keyboard that my fingers like that. Silly.

Today was definitely a hectic day.. I went out with mummy for grocery shopping too, bought 10 packets of junk foods and 2 packets of chocolates. :D Okay, I sense fats! Fml, lost 5kg gain back 2kg. :( I'm on diet again from tomorrow till school's reopen again. After buying, we went back to the car. Mummy was too busy talking to me and there was this car which is same to our car, mummy went to open the door and I was like, "mii, our car is down there." Mummy immediately burst into laughters, seriously, it was hilarious! Luckily the owner wasn't there, boohoo :P

10 days left till school reopen. There's just so much to prepare in fact I went to Miri yesterday, bought nothing but I'm going again soon? To buy bag and novels! I haven't even buy my new uniform! I need a new skirt. I need to cut my hair shorter and fringe. This holiday is not a relaxing holiday at all. Relatives came to my house and keep saying "Next year Olvl depend on you liao lo! Study hard yeah. Holiday don't keep play laptop, take your books out to study." I can feel the stress right now. :( Need to do more of my plans.

Even just now, when mummy drive relative to airport, before he left, he even specially opened my car door just to say, "Jia you ah! Study hard." How can I disappoint them? I don't even have the rights to do so. STRESS to the max :( Siao siao, this time really motivated already.

Other that that, I've been watching "You're beautiful." Now that my maid has arrived, I can enjoy watching my drama without being interrupted and jane introduced me to watch "Khuntoria!" I'm addicted to it already. Why koreans why?

And he knows I'm deeply in love, I'm attached with someone. He ask almost everything about him. My sister told me that and she said she told him everything. He was okay with it because till now he still haven't brought this topic up or scold me. :D Means I'm approved? I felt much more lighter now..

Sleeping back my own room tonight since maid has arrived. I miss my bed, I miss everything. :)

Don't know what to blog anymore, my mind is so blank. What to do on Christmas day? :)

ps; stupid big pimple pop out of nowhere on my face. fts! I hope it disappears soon :D

Goodnight.

/xx.

Where to go?

2010-12-18T20:07:00.002+08:00

I don't know anything about my future. Today, parents already asking me to decide.. Singapore or KL?

I just don't know what to choose. :(

I should be happy but when I know, surprisingly, I'm not really happy at all.

Daddy said, "You this girl for sure will not come back to Brunei live already one."

I wish I can see the future me so I can decide even more precisely. Sigh.

/xx.

Floral is the new fashion! :b

2010-12-17T18:59:00.008+08:00

Hi readers :D

I didn't slept well last night, keep waking up during midnight and the last second time I woke up, I can already see the sky is getting brighter means it's morning already! I'm sleeping back my own room tonight! Peaceful (: So I have to wake up early today to follow mummy out to school, I woke up at 7am then lay down till 7.30am then drag myself to bath. It was a superb, nice and relax shower! Haven't shower this early for a long time already. Miss the feeling! I love being the one who wakes up first and stays awake alone. :D I think I will look for that teacher on monday as mummy is going to school again! I saw the school after the renovation, I think the class looks like toilet to me.

Lunch was superb, mummy cooked. It's my favourite :) I ate till I can't walk! I was super full. This afternoon, mummy's hobby & mood suddenly come again. She has been changing furnitures here and there non stop! Oh yeah, I cleaned the study room yesterday and I feel so nice. I threw away all the rubbish just like throwing the past away (: I found daddy's textbooks! I wanted to throw but big sis say, "Don't you think it has valuable memories?" Made my heart melt so I kept it. Mummy placed sofas into my room, no like! I don't know why. So we sat at the sofa and sis complained her laptop die already. Mummy wants to get her an iPad :( I want too! 16GB is enough! Teehee. Was 1cm away from iPad LOL :(

Dinner time, me and big sis ate dinner together. Then I told daddy, "I will stop eating chicken. I will only eat pork!" Then he laughed. I said, "really ma. pork so yummy. you see ah, cha sau fan is pork, cha sau pao is pork also, yummy de foods right?" HAHA! Agree or not? We were talking about nonsense. Love and studies. She say, "Oho ~ someone's graduating next year!" I was like, "I don't know what to write on the yearbook." Then she replied, "I wrote, wu hua ke shuo." I stared at her. Why so lame? Dots dots. I can't believe time flies so fast, I'm graduating next year!! So soon :( I'm not even prepared yet..

I want to go Thailand. I swear I will tag along when my parents are going there again next year, must! They go see amitofo I go shop alone :D great idea? Hahaha! The latest fashion now is.. florals? I think they're really pretty :3 I want dresses and bags! I want to shop, shop & shop!

cute! love shaped shirt! I want :D

floral dresses (L)

I want this type of bag!

And this type too! So nice :D :D ~

floral designed shoes? :D

I want to hunt for dresses and bags soon, if only I'm slim. Sigh. I feel fat again, this few days keep eating, I should be more determined again! *slurps* slim body (L) Fats, good bye! Stop coming back. Diet plan shall start again tomorrow. :D The only thing is, mummy buys junk foods every 2 days! How to diet? I always see but cannot eat, behtahan :@

Goodnight!

/xx.

Countdowns?

2010-12-15T18:20:00.010+08:00

"I'm different. I'm difficult. You may get me, you may not."

(Y) long hair! (L)

Bonjour :)

It's sad to know that I can't do what I want to do right now because all I can do is just wait for the rashes to recover themselves.. I hope it'll get better like 2 days later! Hahah. I can't do things properly :( Hate sensitive skin ttm, tqvm! Leave me far far away ~

I achieved one of the things I have to do already! Tomorrow, I must force myself to wake up early! I've always tried my best but... who can resist sleeping? My plans are going smoothly so I'm feeling kinda happy right now, not really depressed. I have crazy emotions.. up & down. I might be happy right now, the next minute, if I think of something, I'll get sad again. I have to change and learn how to control my mood ~ :(

I will stop mummy from buying "H" again, buying "H" spoiled everything.. No fun :( So no more "H" anymore! It's enough already! :@ *think positive* hee!

This afternoon I went out a while wearing "I'm single" tee :D Then just now, I went to Gadong to collect something. Mummy and my sister decided to go see the honey shop and leave me alone waiting there?! $%^&! The two guys serving the customers keep staring at me, I wonder, if they're staring at my shirt? HAHAHA. Then unlucky me went to one of their counter, he was so shy and when he was talking to me he don't even dare to look at me! He talks too softly that makes me keep going "huh?" Kinda funny lo. When I reach home, I immediately told big sis the story, she laugh die. Teeeeheee :P

18 more days (:

16 more days (:

11 more days (:

10 more days (:

2 more days (:

5 more days (L)

"I've decided to stay in my own world, I've lock myself in it. Nobody can come in."

ps; Tumblr reaching 60 followers :D this totally made my day!

pps; I love the honey mummy bought today! :D

/xx.

Getting closer.

2010-12-14T20:40:00.003+08:00

"If I know what I'm gonna say will hurt you, I'd rather bury them and hurt myself instead."

Hi beloved readers! :)

I finally finished Summer Desire today.. I love this movie (Y) highly recommended! The guy.. attracts me, not by his looks, but what he've tried to do to get back the girl. But the ending..? sucks to the max :( Maybe I was expecting something better cause the front episodes were really nice! I also finished Gloomy Salad Days already! Wheee :D Next taiwan drama is "The love river." Hope it's gonna be nice ~

I am currently feeding mosquitoes right now. My legs feel so damn itchy, mosquitoes keep sucking my blood recently, my blood is sweet! So they keep coming back for more! Haha!

Big sis early morning complained her love life to me, I was still blur. Then I gave her love advices :D yesh, I can be love teacher, joking! I just gave her some of my ideas.. her summer has finally arrived and mine? I feel so cold, just like winter. My heart is frozen.. colder than the ice.

Sensitive skin, why can't you treat me nicer? I can't hold things properly right now :( I'm very upset.. I hope it'll get better. It's itchiness is driving me crazy already..

I felt something's wrong but I'm afraid that this decision I make will make me regret. I think I need time. I think I'm already used to this situation right now.. confused.. enough of this.

ps; Zac Effron and Vanessa Hudgens broke up :( I'm wondering why, they're such a lovely couple! Hmm.

/xx.

A song I randomly heard from radio..

2010-12-11T16:49:00.002+08:00

對我好　對我好　好到無路可退　
可是我也很想有個人陪 才不願把你得罪　
於是那麼迂迴 
一時進　一時退　保持安全範圍　
這個陰謀讓我好慚愧 享受被愛滋味　
卻不讓你想入非非  就讓我們虛偽　
有感情別浪費　不能相愛的一對　
親愛像兩兄妹 愛讓我們虛偽　
我得到於事無補的安慰　
你也得到模仿愛上一個人的機會 
殘忍也不失慈悲　
這樣的關係你說多完美  
眼看你　看著我　
看得那麼曖昧　
被愛愛人原來一樣可悲 
為什麼竟然防備　別人給我獻媚 
不能推　不能要　要了怕你誤會　
讓我想起曾經愛過誰 我所要的他不給　
好像小偷一樣卑微  
你也得到模仿愛上一個人的機會 
殘忍也不失慈悲　
這樣的關係你說多完美

Treachery..

2010-12-11T16:14:00.006+08:00

Hi readers :)

I've been so lazy to blog lately.. I will quit blogging for a year, starting from 01-01-2011. I had made up my mind, I've decided everything already, 2011 will be brand new year and a nice fresh start for me to start everything all over again. I'm already planning now.. just hoping what I've planned won't turn me down. Next year, no more parties, I'll tuition all the way. :D HAHA!

I guess baby arrived at taiwan already today. First day without him.. a bit not used to it but oh wells, I'll try to keep my mind and myself busy for a week. :)

Oh! And my diet plan works already :) Very proud, satisfy and happy of myself cause by tomorrow, I'll lost exactly 5kg in 12 days! What a miracle. :D I finally success. Perhaps it's because my determination this time was stronger? I want a nice figure! Daddy said, "You got what fats to diet?" -___- I understand myself much more better okay ~ Few more kg to lost and I'll be happy already :) I'm now the thinnest at home, teeheee! Say byebye to fats. *shoo*

I feel like doing something with my hair.. still thinking.. why can't a person own many different types of hair? That would be awesome and life will be a little more perfect. So, in conclusion, there will be a new me next year, everything new :)

I thought we're gonna be strangers forever, walk past each other like we never knew each other before but you changed this cruel truth. You came back looking for me again. "Without me, you seems okay." There's nothing I can do to stop everything but I have no intention to go beyond the boundaries, I'll stay at the red line, hoping you wouldn't cross over.. as the furthest we can go, is only being close friends even when you're still hoping for something to happen.

I wanna migrate, move to somewhere where nobody knows me, my past. I told daddy I want to migrate and he asked where. I said, "Taiwan. :D" Cold water poured towards me! Daddy said, "Aiyer.. taiwan? I thought you want Singapore, Singapore more standard leh." I don't know why daddy have a bad impression towards Taiwan =O

And finally, maid is coming soon! Confirmed liao this time :D Like finally, been waiting for months. She could have come earlier but she wanted to celebrate Christmas before coming here to work so mummy agreed. Few more weeks of torture and I'm free. :D

I want this :(

I love the pink one! :D

Will update soon again.

ps; many people's blog are dead, it sucks when I'm bored and I have no blogs to read :(

pps; The Mall is boring.

ppps; I'll update a post I owe during march because I'm super free now :D

/xx.

Fix things right .

2010-12-07T22:08:00.004+08:00

Hey readers (:

Been really lazy to blog lately .. I just finished watching a taiwan drama called "Scent of love." Not bad, made me laugh all the time :) The ending was a bit sad only. Overall, nice movie! After baby leave, I will movie marathon again so I won't miss him too much. Such a brilliant idea. :P

Holiday every morning mummy prepare superb breakfast but it's really fattening! I am on diet now. Must not look for foods especially snacks but mummy keep restocking! Then I'll be like trying to hypnotizing myself to not eat and making myself hate food. Sad life :(

Sis wants to go swimming tomorrow but it has been raining recently. I want go jogging also cannot. Please stop raining! :) You can rain after I reach my aim, okie? Should I join swimming tomorrow? I prefer jogging or badminton.. go with the flow.

I finally update my songs. I am so lazy to do everything.. but I still need new songs :( Any recommendations? Intro me, thank you! :3

Uncle told mummy that 3rd uncle bought iPad so he told mummy don't buy laptop next time, buy iPad then at night, she ask me to check the price while she Skype with uncle. Really very sien one, I movie till suang suang then till half need borrow her my laptop to Skype! Then we check check, I show her phone website. Did she get the hint? :P

want this! :D

Every night midnight call before sleep.. makes me have sweet dream. The other day, I dreamt of something then I bang wall in real life. Doesn't hurt much cause I was half awake and half asleep!

; After watching newest episodes of Gloomy Salad Days today, I fell in love with Yalun again. :D

Kthxbye. :)

/xx.

Flawless .

2010-12-03T21:35:00.004+08:00

Hi beloved readers.. :)

I am bored.. woke up super late this morning, slept till so nice :D I love sleeping again! I stayed at home whole day today, lazy follow mummy out..

Had supper last night, didn't want to eat at first.. but got forced to eat so I forced someone to half with me :D Say no to "Fats!" No more supper from now on.. must control ~

My korean movie ended today! Still, Marry Me (L) The ending a bit disappointing only, or I expect too much? I love today's episode! It was sad and sweet at the same time :D I'm gonna miss it. Since this movie ended, gonna start new movie, the disc jane borrowed me, "You're Beautiful." :D

During dinner, I told daddy I want join him jogging tomorrow. Then he ask, "sure or not oh?" I say, "sureee!" then he ask again, "really ma? won't last minute say lazy go?" I say, "sure ba. I want jogging." then daddy ask, "or you want swimming?" I ask, "which one can slim down faster?" He replied, "Swimming is make tummy flat.. so what?" I said, "jogging first." Tomorrow jogging! I wanna sweat.. cannot lazy! It's a must must. Jog for 2 hours? It's a task!

Kids nowadays.. so fast mature? So fast know what is love? Enough enough. Age gap.. so big difference and dare to say what nonsense.. never mind, at least you entertained me, kinda funny.. So fast grow up kids nowadays, even know how to ask for number.. dots dots dots. Speechless! Lover and you, I will choose who? Huh? Lester chan! :P ♥

Big sis gaming today? Miracle really happened! I go in the room and she's playing lappy. Me: Am I dreaming? You gaming? Wow.." then she shoo me away, sobs* Last night she watching ghost movie, keep screaming. First time she scream whenwatching ghost movies.. I didn't join them watch (: I don't have the guts to watch, I don't want nightmare.

It's been some time since I last use MSN cause my lappy's msn sucks.. recently downloaded Microsoft Messenger, finally! I miss MSN a lots. Signed it today.. now chatting with jane and someone has gone gaming for 45minutes! What can I do..? Hmm.

Making everything clear is the best, let's go back to the start where we don't know each others, maybe it was not meant to be, maybe I should treat you colder and hurt you deeper. Should have end this earlier to less the pain you're gonna face.

Babyz, I lovez youz. ♥

Good night..

/xx.

I laikeee you!

2010-12-02T21:47:00.004+08:00

Beloved readers..

How is your holiday? I'm bored :) I change my skin already! Nice nice nice? Baby choose one. I think it's okay. I have nothing to do right now.. Oh, my baby boy went back and his coming back after a month! Gonna miss that naughty boy.

I woke up early today, 7.30am but I slept again after a while and woke up at 10 something. The whole night.. sleep like no sleep at all. Maybe because of what happen last night, sorry baby, I didn't mean it.. I'm sorry if I hurt you again! :( Then I couldn't sleep, keep turn turn turn till I fell asleep.. but it's like my brain's awake but my eyes are closing. I had several dreams, nightmares again and the worse one was baby decided to break with me :( I was so heartbroken till I cry, when he left me in my dreams, my sky turned gloomy, I was in pain till I was so scared and I immediately woke up! :( That's the worse nightmare I've ever had in this year.

I went out a while today with big sis. Her driving skills (Y) I love. We nearly get into car accident several times, I think I can drive better than her. When we almost reach home she say, "I long time no drive already!" when the fact that she just drove yesterday. What a bad excuse! And I feel like bang wall when I talk with her in the car. So bai chi can! *smacks head*

I am starting my plan already. I need to plan right now so won't last minute :) I am changing tuition for next year.. hmm? :D Thinking about this, I want to go back that tt, got nice view! :D

big window! :D

I miss this :( soy jelly ~

I love this! nyum nyum :D finished by me!

I'm going on a diet soon. I will go swimming and jogging everyday soon. Exercise 3 hours a day? My aim! I want new looks :D Everything new next year? New life, new hair, new looks, no new boyfriend :P teehee.

Nothing much happen. My movie marathon will start soon. I want this holiday to be busy! I'm gonna learn how to bake egg tarts soon! :D I love egg tarts!

I miss you chan jau hern ♥ ~ :D

/xx.

Hello December.

2010-12-01T16:40:00.000+08:00

Dear readers,

It's the first day of December already! :)

Time flies in a blink of an eyes. 30 more days and it's the end of 2010 already.. and it will be a new start again!

The end. :D

/xx.

Make an effort, make me stay.

2010-11-30T19:32:00.003+08:00

Hi readers :)

Yesterday was our 100th day together! I love you! :) Today is 101st day! Taipei 101? Haha!

Today is the most important day of this year.. it's the day where exciting, nervous, worried and all sorts of feelings are mixed together. I woke up late this morning! Mummy came in and turned on the lights, "WOIIII?! Late lo! It's 6.30am le oh~" My sisters immediately rushed to the toilet. Why cannot wake up? I regret sleeping with them, keep hitting me. Then don't know what happen, me and kim started to shared secrets (: I realize me and her has the same fate. She told me something then she end it with, "cannot tell anyone including your boyfriend ah!" I was like laughing non stop when she said that. Playing with them ended up sleeping at almost 1am ~

Reached school around 7? I received a text when I'm on my way, baby texted me good morning! Is it a habit already? Then I walked to class, I can feel water dripping behind me. I reached class and realize my water is leaking from the bottle. I'm so sorry I made those people's paper wet! Accident happens... right? After that, baby keep disturb me =P wddbc! We went to hall at 8 something, baby still says it's early when the hall is almost filled with people..

The ceremony ended quite fast.. during the ceremony, the guy sitting beside not my boy, kept talking to me.. and ask me to help intro gf to his friend? I was laughing. Then he asked, "You're still sick?" I was like, "Yeah." He kept talking to me, was kind shocked. He shared his stories too. Everyone has their own problems.. They either remain solve or unsolved. :) Went back to class. Aileen still don't want to give back our result slip! She asked us to clean the classroom first! First time. I was shocked with my results, I was expecting the worse so yeah.. I'm not disappointed at all :) I got 23, baby's favourite number! Coincidence or fated? :D I brought all my books home, my bag was damn heavy like it's gonna break. Baby helped me with my bag when he accompanied me back (:

Reached car. First thing mummy asked, "Fail form4?" I was like, "Noooo....!" Then she ignored me le, cause my sister got no1. Jiu shi zhe yang! I feel so motivated right now. Next year, top 10 wait for me! Then big sis take her result slip and compare with mine, showed to mummy. I was at the back, ignoring them. (: Relatives come again after that. More worse. My result is exposed to everyone. They went out with mummy and came back for dinner. After dinner, aunt lecture finish, uncle's turn. Not bad, I learnt something tonight. HAHA! Then, they see my result again. They said, I'm not bad! :P Miracle miracle. I feel even more motivated right now. They ask my mum to find tuition for me this december? Not relaxing at all. O level still got less than one year but I feel so stress right now ~ sigh..

I fell down this afternoon. Quite exciting de oh! Sis said, "EH! Daddy forgot to close the tap?" I rushed into kitchen, forgetting that the floor must be wet, I used run some more, more nice! I slipped and my ankle hit the cabinet and got scratched. :( My skin was... peeled off. Disgusting.. It hurts but I didn't cry :) I'm fearless. This pain mean nothing at all. "I'm a strong girl who keeps her stuffs in line. Even when I have tears going down on my face, I always manage to say those two words, I'm Fine."

Mummy said dimsum tomorrow morning but big sis got exam, her last day so cancelled :( I want dim sum! Oh wait. I hate foods now. Shoooo* go far far away from me please :D I'm quite happy & sad today. Not gonna emo today, not the right day!

And I bought a new bottle already. It's pink =p

bye purple, hi pink ;)

Good night everybody.

ps; might change new look for my blog tomorrow.

pps; it's the last day of November today. Hi December! I wanna do countdown later :D

/xx.

The way you take my hands is just so sweet ~

2010-11-28T23:05:00.006+08:00

Hi readers :)

I woke up early today, miracle.. 9.30am! I've been sleeping late and waking up early in the morning.. I don't know why. Oh, cause I can't breathe so I woke up! It was terrible.. I was running out of oxygen. So I bath and went down and nobody's at home, my sisters are all asleep. What can I do when I'm alone? Watch tv :) Time flies like mad when I'm watching tv, I was watching random channels, food channels. :P I want to travel around the world when I'm 30 years old :D

After that, mummy came back at 11.30pm, I've been watching tv for 2 hours. She bought some groceries so I helped her a while then get prepared to go out for lunch. It was Kim's birthday today! That little girl who always hit me.. and I always lose to her. We were planning to go have some dimsum then uncle came and asked us to go to eat at his place so yeah.. we followed his car out. I saw my baby boy! He was asking for ice cream so his dad gave him ice cream and after he eat, he said, "Who talk, I kiss her." Then I accidentally talked and he wanted to kiss me, he was like pouting and coming nearer to my face. He was hyper, must be the ice cream's fault. He kept wanting to kiss someone.

When we're having lunch, uncle keep bringing up the topic "marriage." I don't know why. He keep asking big sis to find boyfriend and marry then she will push to me == She will say, "Kwang hoe first and smile to me." After lunch, we went back home cause mum's uncle and aunt is coming to my house again. We went to buy cake for Kim. And my baby boy wants me to carry him, so I carried him and gosh, my hands were feeling "suan" already and he doesn't want to come down! He kept holding my legs when I let him down so I have to keep carry him =X My sister said I look like a mummy, I got look that old? Sigh. So we waited for them to buy the cake and went home, baby cousin stayed over :)

We ate the cake after reaching home. I feed my baby boy eat the cake while he was concentrating watching his cartoons. He ignored me and only ate the cake when I feed him! After feeding him, I watch si shen shao nv :D I have to wait till next week again for the next 2 episodes. Then baby was online! Connected hearts (: My msn auto sign in. After that, we skype.. and I chatted with V. I think this is the end.. sorry if I kept pushing you away but it's better for you.. perhaps? Maybe we should go back to strangers again..

At night, relatives had dinner here. I go in kitchen to have my dinner. I took a little only and mum's aunt ask me to eat more, then uncle said, "Aiyer.. she where got want eat many.. she want diet one." I was like, "Toink? faster take and go watch mv." And mummy asked, "How many subs you fail this time?" I replied, "I didn't go school, how I know..?" And I regret now! I should have said 1 or 2, give her xin li zun bei.. sigh sigh! Silly me!

I posted a status last night and gosh, I didn't know many people liked it and I was running out of words to say.. but the post I like the most is baby's :D

My face is feeling hot since afternoon and it's very red.. I look like someone drunk. Baby also said so :S

damn big O.O uncle gave us this ~

I've never seen a fruit this big. =O

I was hungry last night so I cooked supper for me and my sister.. And sadly, I can't even cook mee cause it taste like ... no comment. Before I eat, I asked my sis happily I cook de nice or not and she shook her head. I was disappointed! Never mind, I don't wanna be a chef anyway :p

My boy ;)

Happy birthday Kim ~ :D

He wanted to blow the candles.

Before going to sleep.

I miss you, LCJH. :(

/xx.

I can't imagine what it'd be like living each day in this life without you.

2010-11-27T14:01:00.010+08:00

Hi readers! I'm here to update my blog again :D

Baby went to Miri today for 2 days, I'm gonna miss him terribly T___T :(

2 days without you, this 2 days, I wonder how can I go through it ~ My life is nothing without you.. It's pointless if I go online in Skype, Msn and Facebook for these 2 days cause baby is not even going online. So what's the use if I'm online? I have nobody to chat and bully with :( Since I can't chat with him which means extra time to blog! :D See I'm so nice? Just kidding. I'll just flood this post with my Tumblr pictures, and reaching 50 followers! Wonder who will be the lucky 50th follower :) I got plans for tomorrow too! Si shen shao nv 2 episodes tomorrow :D I love movie marathon!

Actually I wanted to go to school today so I told mummy last night but she said she's lazy to send me and sis is having exams right now so nobody wants to send me to school. Then this morning when I woke up at 10.30, I went down to the kitchen and mummy asked, "Want go school now? I send you." Then I looked at her thinking whether I should go or not and I said, "Nevermind lah.. I'll just stay at home." Miracle always happen (:

The only thing I'm worried about now is my result slip. 30th will be my funeral day, please don't cry for me, don't drop a tear. I know I did not do well this year and so I promised myself that I will work extra harder next year. Now, I'm just hoping my results will not be what I'm expecting that worse. Whenever I think about it, I just feel like bang wall. God, please don't make worse things happen to me again ~ I had enough of them already..

15 more days and my life will be peaceful again. I am counting down this last 15 days! I really wish everything will go back to it's normal position. Sometimes, I wonder how will things be in the next 10 years from now. I wish time could fly right now and not pass by like this slow. I just can't wait to see what will happen. Curiosity kills!

Lester chan (L)

I WANT YOU 23 (:

And I saw something today when I first go to baby's Tumblr.. It made me so happy :D

this was what I reblog, the original one.

then I saw baby's, he edit it...

I was so touched HAHA! I love you.

I think I fall deeper each day, your sillyness is what I love the most. And now, days without you, are meaningless to me. I have never wanted someone as much as I want you. 3 months and a week, 2 more days till our first 100th day. I miss you, love.

p/s; I found my anklet this morning, it's been gone for 2-3 days!! :D

The end!

/xx.

You are my one in 6 billion. :)

2010-11-26T14:10:00.005+08:00

Hi readers :)

I have many silent readers who never bothers to leave a tag :( It's okay, I don't force you all.

Anyway, sorry for ditching my blog for almost a week.. been really lazy, tired, sleepy and all sorts of reasons you can think of ~ :D Soon, I will stop blogging.. just maybe.

Happy belated birthday Baby! Went to his house on 23rd, his last minute planning? Mich and joel followed my car. Something something :)

Currently loving this korean drama! "Still, Marry Me!" Kim bum got my heart. :D How can a guy be so sweet. I've been playing that song's mv in Youtube countless of times. The other day I was bored, I go Youtube. Then guess what are the first thing I saw?

all is Gloomy Salad Days! Coincidence or what? Mummy was watching this last night. I'm waiting for episode 15 & 16! :(

Attended a wedding last night. The bride was my ex teacher and the groom is my relative! I saw many teachers there. Luckily, they sat on another side and I was on the family's side. Then the bride saw me and said "Hi," I smiled back and said "Hi" too ~ She was really pretty. And the newly married couple are very sweet =p The song they played during the wedding, got one I like! And I found it, yay!

they gave every one this :)

I think it's really cute, inside is chocolate :)

This is the song I like from the wedding last night :)

You're stuck on me

and my laughing eyes

I can't pretend though

I try to hide, I like you, I like you.

I think I felt my heart skip a beat

I'm standing here and I can hardly breathe, you got me, yeah

You got me.

The way you take my hand is just so sweet

And that crooked smile of yours

it knocks me off my feet

Oh, I just can't get enough

How much do I need to fill me up

It feels so good it must be love

It's everything that I've been dreaming of.

I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.

Cause no matter what I do,

Oh my heart is filled with you.

I can't imagine what it'd be like

Livin each day in this life, without you.

Without you.

One look from you I know you understand

This mess we're in

you know is just so out of hand.

I hope we always feel this way

I know we will

and in my heart I know that

you'll always stay.

I will blog again soon. :D

I love webcamming with love! (L)

the end.

/xx.

whatever.

2010-11-19T20:29:00.007+08:00

Hi readers :)

Sorry for not updating, was really sick these few days that I don't even have energy to walk. The other day had headache, midnight keep wake up non stop, morning wake up, headache was so terrible to the max so I checked my temperature and it's 38.0 degree celsius!! Then I immediately swallowed 2 pills :( that explain the torturing headache I had..

I'm still sick right now. Fever just won't go away ~ It dropped 1 degree and then gain again later, sucks! I hate medicine. Went to the doctor's 2 days ago I think? Cause really cannot stand it anymore. I think I should blame myself.. because when I'm sick, I still go out with mummy to shop! Then I still eat those ohcipala foods like cha sao fan and kolo mee.. Mummy lazy cook that's why she keep tapau foods recently.. dinner tonight was sushi, nyum nyum (Y)

Watched si shen shao nv ep12 today, tomorrow got 2 new eps! :D Every morning, woke up, watch tv till I don't know what time. Mummy like to watch K.0 3anguo! So random!

I really hate people who gossips a lot about other people. It's non of your business alright? Rumors let you know things you don't even know about yourself. You guys know who you are, don't have to be so obvious (: Don't worry, karma will come back for you. I'm just gonna sit there and see when's your turn.

I am starting to think a lot again.

I love this :)

medicines :( must finish all.

wedding invitation! I'm getting married soon. HAHAHA. Jk!

yikes! I forgot what to blog again. *smacks head* I have short term memory lost ~

Goodnight! Tomorrow is the day (L)

/xx.

Friendship is a million little things ;

2010-11-16T20:59:00.003+08:00

Bonjour. ;)

had siew mai for dinner yesterday! my first time eating (Y) not bad :D It has no prawn so I ate it for the first time and it's good!

dinner night :) chubby-ness!

It's so torturing right now and I'm suffering.. Headache is killing me since when...? Afternoon? I don't know. Think too much? Stayed in front of laptop too long? Feeling drowsy and dizzy right now, I will go to bed soon, get a good rest and get ready for a brand new day. :)

I drank water just now and I hit my lips accidentally, stupid bottle! :( It hurts so badly and I immediately blahh. It was bleeding just now when I checked and I think it's swollen! Hopefully it'll get better soon..

I love today! (L) but exam results just ruined my day so skip that. I woke up late, reached school late, the door was locked, waited outside for a long time, I was waiting for my chance to go toilet cause my palm has a stain of black ink! I have a very sensitive skin, since baby.. sucks to the max! I hate allergies to the max, makes my palm and finger have many red dots :(

So goo booked library for us, stayed for 2 periods, it was boring! Someone dum dum sat beside me ~ DD ah :D Then walked back to class, just realize this gate that gate all lock, need walk long way back.. better close down the school.. Thursday going to Stpri? It's a holiday tomorrow, can't see love! whxn wddbc =D

Chinese composition, I don't have ideas to write, I'll finish it tomorrow, I'll try.. I need motivations so badly..

till heres for today.. forgot what to blog too, headache sucks :(

/xx.

I am just a passerby ; I will walk out of your life.

2010-11-15T15:58:00.004+08:00

Hi readers! =D

Girl: What would you do if I broke up with you? (A joke I love)

Boy: Then... I'd go back to my ex.

(girl cried and broke up with him)

*next day..*

Girl: Hey. What are you doing here?

Boy: Like I said. I'd go back to my ex. So, will you take me back too? (L)

which dum dum used this on me ah when I ask him this too? wddbc ily (:

It's raining right now, I love gloomy skies, they're the best weather to sleep in but I'm here, thinking of ideas of how to write the composition. Due date is on 18th! 3 days time, will I be able to finish it? I'm worried. Rainy days also gives me ideas too, sometimes! So please, give me inspirations on how to start!

Today is the day when bullets shot me continuously, heart attacked and stopped a few times when I received my paper. Heart sank down, deep down into the ocean and can't be found. Wish it was forever gone, I am cold, I don't have to have feelings for anything. :D I am cruel, mean and cold blooded, just like this world.

School was okay. Haven't seen love for days already, hen xiang ta ~ LED show? Hen sweet ma =p I like it ~ (L) Then went to hall for some robo thingy? I don't understand what it's for.. and my house already got one! My uncle that time came back from US bring back de, iRobot. It's a cleaning machine but works on its own. Robot is the new trend? Heartless robots (:

Not satisfy with everything and I decided already, something I would like to keep it to myself. Went home, lied to sis that I failed and ran up to shower without showing papers to mummy. Then when I was bathing, heard daddy outside the door, he knocked and asked me, "You failed form4?" Me, "Huh?? No la ~" Daddy, "Shi la ~ Impossible you fail de ~" Me, "I lied to sis de la.." Then daddy walked away. I went down, trying to avoid mummy but failed. She called me when I was eating.. and asked for my papers. She said I'm the only one left. I showed her and sat beside.. she just looked at all of it quietly. I understand her silence but I've already tried my best. Next year, I'll work harder. Sorry to let you down. The last paper was Chinese, didn't put in last purposely and she said, "Your chinese is the best subject hor?" I kept quiet only. Then she went to Miri with uncle.

After lunch, on Facebook, two inbox. One from JG and one from mich! Super long inbox from her (: wo ye hen xiang ni la ~ faster come back, wo hen lonely T__T take care there!

I wanna walk away from everything and leave everything behind. As if I could, as if I was that strong, as if I got the courage to do so. One day, I will (: Everything leaves a mark but I'll be stronger after that! A promise to myself.

Off to date with chinese composition. :)

/xx.

Eventually, everything will fall apart ;

2010-11-14T20:45:00.005+08:00

Hi readers (:

Didn't blog yesterday cause I started my movie marathon already and I went to dinner last night. I started watching si shen shao nv yesterday afternoon, not bad ~ Actually was planning to watch Summer's Desire but Si shen shao nv is more tempting! I think it's very very cool :D Just two days, I already watched finish 10 episodes, I can continue watch but I think it's time for my eyes and mind to rest (:

The dinner yesterday was fine.. saw Y! I am so shock ~ Then big sis and cousin sat beside me, they're both dragons, year gap 12 years and have same personality. Whenever I message, they both look at my phone and stare to see what I type.. dotsdots. Then got karaoke session, the girl sang "Nobody" then mummy said sing Lady Gaga's la ~ Then uncle said, put meat on her face. Only I get his joke? Cause I am good at humor too then dajie was like "Huh?!?! what he mean?" Then me and uncle laughed. Went back home at 11 plus..

I am sick again :( coughed and sneezed non stop today ~ I need cure and I hate eating pills.

Haven't been productive lately, such a lazybum! At least I managed to throw away at least a kg! Tomorrow start jogging with daddy? Not bad idea. Just hated the silence in the car and daddy will always come up with educational topic which I've already understand but but you gotta act like you're interested..

Emmsee! Ni zhen you yi qi? Xiang wo le ho? How's your trip? I can't wait for you to come back, think about tomorrow, without you in class disturbing, wo hui hen lonely de! Xiang si ni le, kuai dian hui lai. Call me when you're back! :)

Tomorrow is monday. My funeral day? I hope... still got hope right? Not gonna hope high, I dislike disappointments to the max.

I appreciate everything I have now. I am wishing for a big change please ; nobody understand me & what am I thinking, I keep it all inside. I am not hurt..

6 more days & I love you. (L)

Goodnight!

/xx.

Tumblr is the new love!

2010-11-12T22:59:00.003+08:00

Hi readers. :)

It's 11pm right now, just got back from Miri 2 hours ago.. I am so tired and sleepy now but I don't wanna sleep yet cause I'm waiting for someone to finish his late dinner aka supper. Miri trip was okay.. didn't bought anything, nothing fancy caught my eyes perhaps the next time, I'll shop properly. I went there just to eat non stop! Daddy and mummy keep asking me whether I want to eat this or that or not, non stop.. then I said no and they scare I will regret so they kept on asking till I point and show them my if you feed me food again de future tummy and they laughed.

I want this :D all of them ~ new cravings HAHA! That's the reason why I love tumblr, all sorts of my cravings can be found there :D

I think a lot on the way there. Daddy said I am a happy go lucky person because my palm doesn't have much lines then he played with my hair and said that my hair is so little. Believe it or not, my parents scared that my hair is gonna be very little so when I was still a toddler, they help me do all sorts of hair treatments to prevent me from becoming a botak. That's so sad :( cause it means if I didn't do hair treatments when I was young, then my hair now will probably be so little like nothing!

So I went to a super duper rich person's house in Miri. His house and cars... speechless. Then the grandma there is my grandma's friend so they talked about my grandma lo.. When I come down from the car, they keep saying I'm tall and they thought I'm artist. I was wearing slippers some more, where got celebs wear slippers one? HAHA! Then I didn't eat the fruits, then the ahma said, "eat la.. won't fat de.." grrr, her meaning quite deep! She asked us to visit them again during holidays ~

Anyway, my listener has gone from Brunei. Have a safe trip back yo! :D Wo zai deng zhe ni hui lai oh and I know she will miss me a lot cause we waited together after physics pracs and she seems very she bu de me :p *prasan* And thanks for trying to help me with that, hope that you could help me solve this big big problem, Aligato! Teehee.

Since I am so free now, I shall continue with my works. I just remember I got one important mission to complete and a chinese composition to work on and an essay! My life is always busy. I want movie marathon also! Someone want give me movies, so lucky de me? No need go load or download so mafan :D

Physics prac was so #$%^&* ends here. Just hoping for a passing mark (: I'm not greedy.

Tomorrow night wedding dinner again. I hope I won't get comments about me becoming chubby or etc! Tqvm ~

Goodnight! :)

/xx.

I'll be fine but not this time ;

2010-11-11T14:44:00.008+08:00

"The moment you feel nothing at all is the moment you realize how badly hurt you were.."

Barley (Y) I'm addicted to all these drinks now.. used to hate it last time. Yeah, things changed, if we can't change them, they'll end up changing us (:

I woke up super early today.. can't sleep properly whole night. Nobody's gonna wake me up, I feel so stress so midnight keep wake up check time. Then I even dream that I was late for practicals!! I immediately woke up and check time and I just realize it's a dream and to make things worse, I go back to sleep again and have the same dream again. Biology practicals, I was running out of time, thanks to Halishi who kept asking me stuffs non stop! My bunsen burner can't boil, put there 10 minutes still the same, and chai helped me :D Thanks saviour! It's because the aircon is blowing towards my burner. And when I light up the burner, everyone looking at me.. Dots dots. It took me so long to light it up.. My lighter is working like %^& too! Delayed everything but luckily I managed to finish everything in time.

On the way to school, daddy asked when exam end so I said tomorrow. Then I say next year O'level I will stress die.. Daddy said, It's a path everyone will go through. He asked what I wanna do after form5. I said, "Don't feel like studying le. I go work." He said, "Oh? work as those lauya workers ah?" I said, "Don't know. See how it goes." He asked me to study lawyer and skip form6.. He even said why I'm not even nervous about my future.. Lawyer jiu lawyer, I'll study anything my parents want me to be.

Since exams ended and maid is coming soon! Yes, my maid haven't arrive yet but I'm used to doing house works now just that sometimes I will forget to put clothes in the dryer. Then mummy will go yada yada! I find that irritating sometimes. So when the maid arrive, I'll start my movie marathon. Because of exam, I sacrificed a lot! But what did the results give me in return? Sigh. "The bigger the expectation, the bigger the heartbreak." F T S :(

I don't need any reason to feel stress. I feel so down from yesterday till now, keep thinking of this and that non stop. Yeah, problems and worries, you can come back to me now. Sorry for putting you all aside for so long.. I feel like ending everything but if only I have the courage to do so. 2010 is such a disaster year. I don't know things became like this. It's kinda obvious that you started to stay away from me and tried to ignore me.. Other than that.. a lot of things happened. I kept them all to myself. Sometimes, I would really love to find someone and spit everything out. When I'm really hurt, I keep silent. Don't ask me what's wrong because it'll only remind me the pain. I've been lying to myself all these time that I'm strong but the truth is, I'm only good at avoiding all these problems.

There's just too much to solve, everyday keep thinking and worrying.. I wish there's a "stop" button for all of this. :(

Picture time, from Tumblr!

This is what I always do HAHA!

Sweet talks kills (:

so true!! stressed = desserts. I want go buy ice cream now. I miss Bulla's oreo :(

; I'll be fine but not this time, don't comfort me, tqvm. I'm done with putting a mask on and act like I'm okay when the truth is I'm not. I'm tired already.

goodbye.

/xx.

Break your promise, it's okay.

2010-11-10T17:29:00.015+08:00

Hi readers! I'm back to this social life again ~ :D

During this time I didn't touch Facebook which really helps a bit cause can concentrate more and when I'm back to Facebook, I realize a lot of things had change, yeah, should have knew it from the start, everything changes including those peoples. You can't expect them to stay the same just for you.. I think I missed out a lot of stuffs.. And exams finally ended today! I smell freedom. Finally, a week of pure mind torture has ended.. but there's 2 more practical exam left, can't wait till everything actually ends. I need to relax, I am feeling very stress right now.. I was sick before exam starts, I guess it's because of stress. That day mummy fetch me from tuition, I go in car, finished one sentence and she replied me, "You fever ha? *touch forehead* And I replied, "nola.." Seriously, I sneezed everyday during exam ~ I hate being sick :( especially when I can't even breathe properly.. Daddy forced me to go see doctor but I refused by saying, "Doctor's medicine eat le will sleepy, I still need to study de.." Then he asked me to drink more water and he even cooked green bean soup and barley for me (L) and the other night me and my sis made grass jelly drink! Yumyum ~ I miss it now.

Exams haven't end already got people want book my holiday time.. I don't know what to do with them so I'm giving excuses cause I don't wanna cause any troubles and make myself have worries.. I am stuck in a very complicated situation now.. Right now, all I want is to be alone. I don't know why but please don't talk to me.. I want peace.. that's all. An unexplainable feelings I'm having right now, can't describe it.

There's one morning when I was sweeping leaves, I found a unique leaf, it's heart shaped (: It caught my attention. It wilted already now, I didn't take good care of it but the next day when I sweep, I saw another one again but the shape is not really nice.

Prove! I'm not lying, why got heart shaped leaf one?

Then, mummy bought me a pink Hello Kitty luggage during exams. It was a surprise, she kept it inside the room. After that she asked me to go the room and see it, how sweet of her (: She make me wanna travel now, I wanna travel alone, Singapore next year? I want start do plans already!

pink luggage (:

During exams, I slept in another room so this baby didn't accompany me to sleep for a week! I will sleep with it again tonight (L)

Other than that, I got my earpiece on the day before exams started. Thanks C! I really like it. It's nice. And the quality really different from normal earpiece ~ It comes with a bag too.. Now I want a new phone.. cravings is killing me.

heartbeat earpiece.

Mummy bought snacks and junk foods too but I can't eat them cause I was sick that time so I have to eat them secretly.. so yeah, probably that's the reason why I'm still in the process of recovering right now.. blame myself for being weak to food's temptation!

I love the chocolatos! It's yummy! (L)

The other day, was playing around with the curtain and I looked out of the window is two little birds. They can't see me cause I'm inside then I see them love each other.. so cute to the max ~ Rarely can see birds in so near distance cause they'll fly away when you go near them.. Feeling a bit lucky ~

birds!

Mummy everyday asked how did we do during exams, sometimes, don't felt like telling her the truth all because I hate giving her disappointments.. This feeling really sucks. Now, I'm just hoping I don't fail any subjects this time *wish wish*

Few minutes ago heard mummy say the world's time is changing already. US time has changed cause the other day mummy Skype with uncle, it slows by one hour again. I was like, "Wow? So cool? Can change time de? If got I also want.." And she brought letters home.. Got one from india? It was sent to the wrong mailbox. I opened and see, guess what is it? A piece of newspaper! Toink!

I am -10 degrees celsius! I like this quote, from the new korean movie, I wanna be cold from now on. And my plan starts today? Or perhaps tomorrow. I hope it'll works and come true before 2011.

Facial tomorrow? Mummy said she want bring me go do tomorrow but I don't know if it's confirm and mummy shou le ci ji, she cut her hair sibeh short and keep asking me to cut mine like her's! I don't want to cut my precious long hair! Fringe is sibeh long le, need to cut ~

There's so much to say but I can't think of them anymore so my posts ends here first, will update it if I think until anything.. Too tired to think right now. Leave me alone ;

/xx.

There's just so much to say in so little time ;

2010-10-28T14:10:00.005+08:00

There's a feeling that I don't know how to describe. I studied already but there's a feeling that I haven't studied at all which terrifies me a lot :( Had Paper 1 today, I'm satisfy with my BM but not ENG, which makes me very disappointed.. And to the bai chi dum dum guy who passed me love notes during exam just now, you are so sweet and dum! :P

I AM GONNA WORK HARD THIS TIME . THROW MY PHONE AWAY . KEEP A DISTANCE FROM MY LAPTOP . STAY AWAY FROM THE TV . ALL I'M GONNA DO IS JUST DATE WITH BOOKS FROM NOW .

There's not much time to waste, I don't wanna lose again . Hate it ! Tuition tonight, tomorrow afternoon, just 2 tuition already make me feel so tired and lazy ! LAZINESS, stay away from me please , as far as you can, don't come near me, I don't want you! *Shoooo*

put a SMILE on your face, life is too short for you to be sad, so be happy (:

I swear this is gonna be my last post! No more updating. I am GONE from now just like how I can be gone from Facebook world! I can do this, I believe I can. Confidence =D

There's a lot to blog but I'll blog after exams ends ... so ...

till heres.

AND, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEL CHIN TAEYANG! :D

/xx.

Just the way you are ;

2010-10-26T19:59:00.007+08:00

Playing my current favourite song by Bruno Mars (Y) I love it :D "Cause girl, you're amazing, just the way you are ~ and when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while (8)" It's nice, try listen to it :p

Been busy these days but I love being busy, keeps my mind away from the world of gossip, in fact I can't even log in my Facebook anymore, I'm out from the Facebook world :) I'll be back after exam ends! I'm outdated now, lalalaa ~

Reached school, got the news that we're having PE in the afternoon. This sucks cause it means we have to run 1500m? No preparation at all. bai chi sat at my place today? I keep giving him the lame face, seriously, why you so ben? :P And we suddenly came up with the topic of "How did we know each other?" I seriously forgot how did I know him, or is it because of a deck of cards? I'm not sure.. but he kept saying is I talked with him first which is so not true! :P I wonder how my life will be now if I didn't know you xD

A lot of people said I look thinner now? Even big sis? HAHA. Yesterday afternoon she vain non stop using her phone in study room and she vain de photo... speechless (: She said, "She's still learning." I taught her how and took picture with her then she say, "Eh kwang, ni shou le ~" WHEE :D Albert asked me if I got diet today, then I said no? He said cause I look thinner! SLIM (L)

I finished my POA homework yesterday night and surprisingly, the way my sister taught me is less confusing compare to teacher's! I don't know whose method to use now .

English period? Don't know what happen to mich and keat. They keep fighting non stop, childish to the max. One use plastic ruler, one use metal ruler to fight with each other? I wonder what's on their mind. And jane said they make a good couple, and I agree :D They got "fu qi lian." I got a feeling, a prediction that they'll be together in the future but I don't know when will this day come. I will wait mich ~ :D

Ran 1500m . I totally forgot that my right leg still hurts but I still ran anyway . The part that have to jump, makes my leg and foot hurts even more. I wanted to stop.. but I can't give up. Everyone keep saying my face red and those guys waiting the place there asked me to use walk instead of run cause face too red. Seriously so red? And the sun was burning hot! After we ran, it became cool, shitty :( And love helped me take my stuffs when we walked back to class (L) (:

After that, had chinese one period. And I'm having Add Maths tuition so I walked there with bai chi chan. On the way there, ask me walk slow, then say very weird? You're weird :P Stayed at the small restaurant there for a while then I went up after baby went back. In tuition, I didn't get to do so much questions, too exhausted! Luckily next year no more PE anymore! And soonai's phone inside got mimi already? Yap told us what is it, aiya, got people grow up le :D

Nothing much at all for now, simple life, simple story, I wanna get away from complicated world, escaping. Can tell me what's going on now ? Between you and me.. What still remains there? Are you still waiting for something to happen?

I'm off to finished up my Add Maths homework, I'm dating with Maths tonight ;)

/xx.

; I'd rather feel nothing at all, it's much more easier .

secluded myself ;

2010-10-23T14:36:00.007+08:00

Hi readers ! (L)

I'm here to update again, my Facebook and MSN password have been changed by love so I can't log in anymore which helps me to concentrate even more in exams plus my Tumblr is not working now!! I am so pissed!! I don't know what's wrong with it :( I need help! If any of you who uses tumblr, please leave a message at my tagboard, thank you very much! :D

Last night, did a silly thing when I was arguing with sis, she likes to study where I study, we always argue when we're together. She keep saying me non stop then I feel so so so super damn mad at myself and I did something which hurt myself but it's not pain at all. Then I cried, not because it hurts but because of unknown reason then mummy scolded her and asked her why she bully me and make me cry ~ In the end, I still win!

Mummy cook de breakfast today... no taste. Felt so guilty telling her that cause she kept asking for my opinion. As usual, go school then had English. She was bombing us again today and kahchiong asked why I brought Ribena to school. Then teacher aimed him and asked him to tell it out loud. Teacher even said, "Truth hurts" for a few times and I agreed. HAHA! After that, teacher asked him out after class ends. Teacher don't know what's Ribena? Sttvm ~ Felt so nervous for my 1500m but it started to be gloomy outside then it gets darker and it rained which means no running today but we ended up running inside the hall for 15 minutes, so tiring! Then we had PE under the drizzling rain, it was nice! :D

After that, chinese period, teacher asked us to write imaginary composition, imagining ourselves in the future after 20 years from now. Yap, lingyong and kahchiong were discussing about their future so I joined them. They said they wanna live together with their wives, give birth to lots of kids and many many. Then they asked if I wanna have my own kids, then I said no. They said I don't know how to "please" my husband in the future. After that I asked them, "will you guys help your wife cook dinner, wash the dishes and clothes?" They said "yes," and I replied "I will go visit your house in the next 20 years and see if you really mean what you said." Their future plans, is really damn funny.

After that was physics? lingyong and kahchiong sat beside me. Then they started to sing! "I like it," "Ao Ye," "Tong hua" and I forgot the other one. Ling yong likes Emma Watson! His taste so high? He said "Wow, Emma watson is gorgeous man. She's so hot!" I was shocked :P Then he sing a song for her and I suggested that both of them should video it in Youtube and they will only have 0 views :D Then they asked about my weight, didn't know I look that thin to them, that definitely made my day!

This girl? SEXY, HOT & PRETTY. I want a body like her's hahaha ~

blogger got new home page! Not bad la :D

try solve this ;)

I just came back from the wedding dinner. I heard that lots of people are getting married tonight :) Saw lots of people and I saw erica too, he keep sticking his tongue out to me. It was okay lah.. and mummy told uncle, "wedding de food menu, always is these type of foods hor?" Then uncle said, "Bah, we create a new menu in the future. First dish, Pizza! Then pasta and ice cream after that chocolate! Geng or not?" This dream, have to wait 10 more years :D And aunt said I became fatter cause my face is rounder now :( *sobs* I didn't gain any weight leh! Sad die me to the max! :(

Tuition was okay? Was doing in a rush. I reached tuition then saw Harris already, I called him fat and he said he wanna fall from stairs so can squish me so we both die. LOL! And Nong's kampong accent? Quite nice lo & unique! :D I went back early as I have to rush for tonight's event. And mich hurt my feelings cause she say she don't wanna miss me ~ Then mummy came fetch me home, she went to cut & dye her hair. I like the colour, dark brown! Suits mummy :D

And, my tumblr is working fine now, followers keep increasing, and the reason why my tumblr stuck is because I've reached the daily amount for a day! I love tumblr that much okay! I'm addicted to it :>

Someone is addicted to LoL and I think it's becoming more important than me already!

THE END FOR TODAY. :)

I know I have a lot of silent readers! Why you don't want leave a tag so my tagboard will be alive?? teehee ~

Goodnight,

/xx.

I went to the seashore to pick seashells.

2010-10-22T11:40:00.008+08:00

Hi readers :D

I woke up early today, 8:15am! It's not a miracle anymore cause I slept early last night and I had a nightmare again. I am immune to it, not afraid, I am stronger now, fearless! :D I dreamt of monitor lizard, so many of them came to my house and one of them is the size of a crocodile. I know I have weird dreams!

Last night after tuition, I keep laughing at harris. Then he said he want to commit suicide?! I said, "Don't la. Later even the hospital also don't want keep you cause too fat." It's really fun teasing him and I laughed non stop! We were talking about heights and all. After that vk's phone rang, then ngam ngam got one indian came out from his house talking on the phone too then cy asked, "Eh vk, you talking to him ha?" Laugh die me ~ Then my car came le =p

Anyway, since I've got nothing to do so I went to Facebook and saw this profile selling Lomo cameras! All of them so mad cute okay?? One word, Regret! So it's back to my cravings list again :} From what I know, very few shops sells lomo camera here.

Biscuit camera!

this is a camera not drink packets :P

I want this! So cute :D

got smiley face!

this one looks like.. an antique ;)

this is the one my aunt bought in Taiwan.. quite nice :D

this one is unique. :D

this is nice!

I want this too!

The main reason why I want to buy Lomo is because it has cute designs, it's unique and most of all it can take super nice photos without editing it using computer!!

see? no edits at all :)

lomo camera takes nice pictures like this ~

I want Nike Air sneakers! And I finally know why I didn't bought it in Taiwan, it's because the sizes there are super small, cause the girls there all so tiny size one == but I will not give up and will hunt for them soon again :D

Something is wrong, something is missing but I just couldn't find the right answer to this question . Let it remain unsolved ;

The reason why I'm updating my blog now is because I'm bored, I'm waiting for love to wake up and I'm hungry which can distract me thinking of foods! Isn't it a great idea? I'm not on diet okay, it's just there's no food to eat at home and I lazy cook korean mee :3

Good luck everyone in your upcoming exams!

/xx.

Budge over .

2010-10-20T15:14:00.001+08:00

I just feel like blogging today.. and today's date is special :D it's 20.10.2010! In fact, there's one more occasion which made it even more special :3 I love you! 2nd with you ~ Thanks for making these 2 months special. (L)

And tumblr is purple today!! I got 40 followers already! I hope it'll continue increase. The reason it's purple is to support those people who committed suicide cause they're GAY :( RIP!

Super happy also today!! Mich said my fats are gone, cause she couldn't like pinch my waist. Such a nice thing!! I wish fats are all gone, faster! Then during lunch, argued with Halishi. After 3 years, he still cannot accept the fact that his shorter and fatter than me? Then just now, he asked me to wait again, he keep finding excuses but I still win in the end :D

1500m in two days? I am not looking forward to it, I'm just hoping I will survive after running!

Please make up your mind. If you're trying to make me feel something, then I guess you failed. Stop it. I don't wanna get confused again. I just hope things will go back to it's original position. I don't wanna change a thing. If you want my attention.. then, I have nothing to say anymore..

Just a short update (:

/xx.

Saccharine love songs .

2010-10-19T20:49:00.002+08:00

Bonjour ~ :D

I am here again to update my dead blog, didn't mean it but the truth is, I've been really busy these days, homework already occupies most of my time which explains why I've been inactive lately :) Chatting with V now. I didn't know his been waiting for me to on everyday ~

I think I've missed out so much fun things in my life, especially spending some quality time with my friends.. which makes me feel so guilty somehow... I've got so much to say but I don't know how to say it out..

I sleep very early these days but my eye bags are still getting darker and darker. I don't know why and jane said it's because of stress. Perhaps that will explain my oh so nice eye bags now! Makes my eyes look smaller.. And I think jane was right, I keep waking up during midnight for several times, I can't sleep well.. and every night, I have nightmare. Awesome ~ I am immune to it already. This year, just doesn't seem good enough for me. One word = STRESS.

I've started Chemistry tuition already, it's a 4 hour tuition, not bad :) I like it cause very little people! Only me and one guy, and I can ask whatever question I like. This week, she'll be teaching us formulas, I'm excited and looking forward to it!

I am in love with books, I am dating with books every night. They're my best date partner ever! Dots dots, I will fall in love deep deep with those thick textbooks :)

I don't wanna expect something high this year, I know I'll get disappointed badly, terribly and horribly. It's okay, I'll try harder next year. I still can't believe I'm graduating from CHMS next year, I still don't know where to study and what to study. Daddy wants me to take LAW and I'm okay with it.

This should be a short post but I don't know why it became this long.. I will update again soon! When I have extra 2 hour! Wait for me :D

HONESTY is needed (:

I'll be gone ;

143 , has a deep meaning and could be only said to you .

/xx.

Let's meet in Paris.

2010-10-16T22:06:00.006+08:00

Bonjour! :)

I am blogging now, I've wasted like 2-3 hours online instead of studying. Yes, I didn't touch my book tonight but that's okay cause mummy and I were doing almost the same thing ~

I had a paper cut few days ago, seriously, it looks so not serious but it hurts so much when it touches water and it's very itchy sometimes. I hate paper cuts! :( So my poor finger, is still bandaged right now.. I found a heart shaped leaf yesterday when I was sweeping :D It's pretty and unique! And I saw the mixed blood baby, he is so cute!! His voice also damn cute one okay!! Makes me wanna have a baby when I grow up, but no, I haven't change my mind yet ;)

And good news, maid is coming before end of this month which means, I can concentrate during my exams!! Thank God :) If not, I'll definitely have no much time to revise which is a oh so not good thing.

Today, I laughed at mich when she came into the class. Her forehead, nose and lips are injured because she stood behind the door when her mom is opening it. I laughed at her for so long, it's so funny that I couldn't stop myself from laughing, ooopsie! I hope she'll get well soon and her injuries won't leave scars (:

I nearly fell down today in class and I used my arm for support.. it is so damn pain now :( ouch. I'm kinda glad that we don't have to run 1500m today, still got time to train! Oh yeah. I told daddy about it and he said "so little nia meh?" I was like giving the wth look and keep complaining that it's 4 rounds. Oh wells, daddy and I are both stubborn people ;)

And, I promised daddy I will change my bad habit, my 16 years of bad habit. I will and I must! But he caught me doing it for a few times and he just stare at me till I realize, grr! I need more determination.

Went to tuition in the afternoon. It was nice cause I actually started to fall in love with Add Maths. I just hated Linear Law, that's all. I hate things that have to do with graphs but I need to get use to it :) And goo kept saying we have the same ancestor. I hope my maths was good too! *wish wish wish* Then, goo said I'm smart and loh said, "as if." And I don't know why his like trying to piss me off but I'm nice de right? I hold it in. Then vk said I'm white and he changed his mind, make me happy for 3seconds only.. He called me, "red face girl." :D I don't know why face keep red red these days ~

Listened to mich's and sy's talking and goo kept calling my name non stop so yeah, I just listened to half of their story.. And I hope 2nd one will appear in class (: And what happened to me and someone? I can feel there's something wrong between us, it's like, you purposely make a distance between us, if this is what you want, then I'm fine.. I'll try to get used to it.

Nothing to blog anymore (:

Follow me in tumblr! I love tumblr (L)

When I marry, I want pink balloons and I want it to be held in Paris :D

Live. Laugh. Love. :) 3 simple rules of Life.

; Words hurt but your silence pierces through my soul and gave me the deepest pain.

Good night! (:

/xx.

It's a sin .

2010-10-13T16:27:00.007+08:00

Aloha!

I want this, the pink one . Will ask uncle to find this in US :D

Uncle is back already. So not used to it without him around here anymore.. His on his flight back now to Los Angeles! 12 hours. I guess mummy will start to skype with him soon again (:

*I am eating the jar of candies mich gave me, it's so yummy too!*

Duty today, sweep sweep! Then I had a talk with jane after that. What's wrong with that guy? If you know treating girls like that will make them fall, and you find those easy fall for boys type of girls to talk and play with, don't you know that it's dangerous? Jane told me and I knew this too, just never really want to bother about it, till jane brought up this topic. His too friendly and someday, this will bring him a lot of problems in the future. And it's obvious that the 2 girls somehow got good feelings on him too (: I'm just gonna keep it inside my heart, not gonna say who they are.

Had plenty of homework today. I am running out of time yet I'm still here making my blog alive. I will be on a hiatus soon, I guess? I will try to blog everyday.. people, try to update your blog too so I'll have something to read when I'm bored ~ I wanna update our blog but I'm just too lazy and all, I will update our blog soon too, when I have free time. :)

Just now in the car, daddy asked if I still got that. I didn't deny but I smiled to him, I don't wanna lie.. I think daddy knows the answer himself. He asked again, "Wei ah.. Hao wan ma?" I smiled and say, "hen hao wan oh!" I made him speechless (: I am very aware and conscious of what I am doing, I won't cross over the line .

Someone was a bit mad in the library today.. I thought you love to eat vinegar? Sorry for feeding you too much with it plus it's you who wanted to see it. I love vinegar tank (L)

I'm done blogging, tumblring, facebooking and twittering therefore it's time to go off now, time for brain cells to work non stop!

; When I don't answer you, it's not that I don't wanna tell you anything.. but silence doesn't always mean yes, it doesn't mean no either, just that, it's better left unsaid.

/xx.

Trust ; Loyalty .

2010-10-12T20:05:00.005+08:00

Boooooooom.

I had ice cream again today in the afternoon :) It was yummy... *slurps*

The other day I went to Miri.. I bought a pair of flats sandals and sis craving to buy Nike shoes so when we wanted to buy, uncle said it's not real and bla bla, I guess his saying it cause his rushing to come back already :P I wanted to buy too T_T spoiled my trip but it's okay.. mummy say, next time :) I saw sy's shoes? There sell pink colour one! But I want Nike Sneakers so badly! Why here haven't sell yet? Really regret to the max didn't buy in Taiwan :( Brunei & Malaysia's fashion so slow!

Then on the way back, I had hiccup for an hour plus, that is a torture. I keep "ugh" non stop and sis ask me to drink water but I don't want. Then when want reach home, I was looking out of the window, and uncle hit my leg! Shock die me and my hiccup stop. I thought nobody heard it..

Anyway, today is a normal day again :) Nothing much happened. And got a guy keep inbox me in fb? He know me very well, like his a part of my life, something like that, a bit kua zhang but it's true and guess what? I don't even know who is he! I can't remember him... I wonder why he inbox me instead of wall .

Eyes keep jumping non stop today. Left & right, non stop, I want something good to happen not bad thing please! I believe in miracles (: please happen everyday, I'll be glad ~

Daddy went to tasek today before I came back from afternoon class. He said, A is a nice guy, he looks innocent, very good boy type, can be with him and all.. I was like, "don't simply say please. I never said he like me okay . Don't think too much . We're impossible." Daddy keep saying nonsense, and I can memorize already, stop the nagging please !

During physics period, laughed like crazy peoples there. Erica, me, mich, baby and chai :D Me and mich are making fun of chai's name, sorry but it's really funny that I can't stop myself from laughing but baby was the one who didn't laugh! In the end, I get to make him laugh cause I said a lot of prank things. He ended up laughing like crazy and I laughed till cried! :P

And mummy said she wanna buy a Hello Kitty luggage.. I was like laughing and she said it's for me? What ~ Hello Kitty, isn't it a little bit too childish for me? She said, it's pink oh. I want new phone mummy, make this happen soon :(

Uncle going back to US tomorrow morning, can't send him off, have a safe trip uncle (: he said, he go back do business, if success, iPhone 4 will be my present when he come back ! I'll be waiting for this day to come :D

Speechless . I forgot and don't know what to blog anymore, tata readers :D

; And you, please believe me when I said nothing.. cause it's really nothing, it's not important. Sometimes, just hope you can understand...

/xx.

Happy birthday to ME.

2010-10-11T20:28:00.007+08:00

Hello readers :)

Today is a special day for me? I woke up kinda early today. :) And checked phone, got 4 messages? Thanks to those people who texted me, you know who you are :D thanks a lot!

Then went to school late today cause sister is the one who sent us to school. My mood was kinda good today and sis woke me up at 12am just to greet me! How sweet of her? :D Then I reached school, some of them greeted me. Nong was the first, I think? And I forgot who, bong them greeted me too xD Then Jasmond gave me a hug and Brennick greeted me ~

After that, jane asked me to accompany her to toilet. Then I came back from the toilet, Harris, Yap them greeted me? Thanks a lot guys! :) Then classes as usual.. till recess.. I wanted to do maths? Then suddenly people behind me sang Birthday song and they turned off the lights. I was sitting with baby and I was super shocked.. I didn't know they bought a cake! I was surprised. Then mich, jane and baby gave me presents ~ Thank you guys, I really appreciate it a lot :)

Then it was physics period, teacher came in with a serious face. She said, "Someone did bad stuffs in school and was caught in the CCTV. " Everyone was guessing and talking. Then teacher said again, "I was shocked that person came from your class.." Then she looked around and called my name and asked me to stand up. I felt like crying that time till teacher suddenly clap her hands and sing Happy birthday! OMG.. I got heart attack that time and I keep thinking what bad things did I do! Anyway, thank you teacher :D

A lot of people greeted me too.. I was surprised. So many people know my birthday :) Aaron was funny.. Jing jing greeted me too and tung came to class and hugged me ~ I came back from lunch, on the way to class, y9 people greeted me too ~

Thank you everyone for making this day special and memorable :)

jane gave this :) it's almost finish le.

my favourite!

I love her cookie.

mich's :D

sweets and letter :)

sis gave me this. HAHAHA!

baby's (:

I will sleep with this every night :D

At night, with family..

bakerlyn's cake. I don't like the words written on the cake ==

pizza for dinner..

3 boxes!

I eat till so full ~

I will edit this post again, so tired from replying walls.. thanks for the greetings everybody. I love you all very much! :D words can't express how I feel.

Thank you love, jane, mich, seiying, cheaying, nong, bien and others :) I appreciate it lots lots. Hope you can feel dao my xin yi , thanks for making it a memorable one (:

/xx.

Surprises.

2010-10-10T21:48:00.002+08:00

Aloha :)

I was supposed to blog last night but then internet was down.. I hacked someone's facebook account yesterday and posted 3 status! :D iloveyou ♥

So yesterday, mummy bought lots of snacks! There was chocolates and ice creams in the fridge then there was junk foods in the living room, made me eat non stop = fats!! That explains the tummy ache I had in the middle of the night last night. I went to toilet and I fell asleep inside! HAHAHAHAHA! But I woke up for I don't know how long later.. :P

And last night I told mummy I wanna go to Chem tuition today. She said, "Why so last minute? Who ask you early not hardworking enough?" Toink ~

This morning woke up early again. My dreams are fooling me, ever since this year. I want sweet dream! Uncle came back from outside and he had dimsum with 4th uncle. He brought cha sao pao home and told me, 4th uncle is the one who make it. I believed it even though I saw the tapao box!! I trust people easily. Then, I still don't believe and keep asking then he spit the truth out when mummy came back home. He said, "Kai wan xiao de la.. 4th uncle ask me to joke you all is he make de.." Then mummy said, "Bah! call 4th uncle and say thanks sun bian say, you make de pao very nice, ask him to make again next time." Then sis called and uncle laughed in the phone loudly! Then uncle told us stories about the past again. "Past is a nice place to visit but not a nice play to stay."

Lunch is gonna be sushi because uncle is teaching mummy how to make. Mummy wants to learn. Mummy loves Japanese foods now, she used to hate it ~ So cute la her! Then tonight's dinner is porridge? I want to eat pasta! :( I hope tomorrow's lunch or dinner is gonna be pasta!

It's 12:27 pm now. Last minute plan, I'm going to Miri now! Not going to tuition anymore! I hope I can cancel out some cravings.. Life's unpredictable, it's true. No wonder my left eye keep jumping this morning, I hope something good happens!

For you people who haven't realize, today is 10/10/10! I missed out today's 10/10/10 10:10:10am this morning! There's still one more to go tonight, 10:10:10pm!

Tomorrow is the day :)

/xx.

Can't lose no more .

2010-10-08T14:55:00.008+08:00

Aloha. I am here blogging again.

I'm bored, was playing with virtual piano a moment ago with C's help. He intro me that website like few months ago and send me those notes.. I'm still a beginner though. And I like the heartbeat's earpiece that C wanted to give me :D Is it my eyes got colorblind or what? Cause the color looks like red instead of pink to me. :P C also wonder if it's pink.

this is the earpiece .

I wanna go tasek later but the weather seems so dull & gloomy today. And I'm waiting for daddy to wake up from his nap. I wonder if he can wake up or not. I really wanna go and he said, "You ah, last minute de!" I just realize, I'm last minute type of people ~ This is me :)

My problems aren't solve yet but I felt a little bit better now.. Don't wanna worry too much right now, just go with the flow, it's the best. Thanks nong for asking last night, don't worry, I'm fine.

I just finished arranging my files in laptop, all pictures are arranged accordingly and I've deleted unwanted stuffs. It's neat & tidy now, love it ttm :D I haven't arrange my music folders yet and my laptop's softwares are all updating right now.. waiting, dots dots dots .

Thanks cy for your advanced greetings! :D

In the afternoon, I sweep outside my house, leaves keep falling, it's Autumn already! Before that, I saw three male dogs gang the only female dog in my neighborhood, I was afraid to go out and sweep. I've never seen those 3 male dogs before, maybe they just moved to my neighborhood?! As long as they don't come near me and chase me, if not I'll use my high pitch screaming and scare them away, mwahaha ~ cause I'm evil like that :b

After that, I played swing, in the windy weather, I so love the weather today. I didn't go to tasek. Then I went in home and used the pc to change my blogskin. I think my new blogskin is kinda nice :) Don't chu think so? I will edit the colors soon, when I'm not lazy again!

Oh and guess what? Tung just tweeted me, yap and bien. She said, tomorrow no 1500m cause PE teacher have class outside. YAY! So classmates whose reading, tomorrow no need run anymore! :D I think God is helping me cause I actually wanted to go tasek and do last minute training but then.. coincidence happens! I am so happy cause I still got time to train. Thanks Tung for telling :P

I want things to get better soon. Will miracle happen again, just one more time, for me?

; I don't know how my life would be like if I don't have you .

till heres.

/xx.

Why can't love be simple?

2010-10-07T20:17:00.006+08:00

..... Hi readers.

It's not a good day today. Although I look happy but I'm having a lot of worries right now. :( And mosquitoes just won't leave me alone, they keep kissing me! Damn itchy..

I skipped Add Maths tuition again. I should be doing something useful right now but instead I'm blogging but that's okay.. And instead, I mask in the evening! A nice way to spend my evening? Something happened yesterday. And I knew the whole story this morning, thanks to "her." Don't spread something stupid please.. It's not what you guys think. I told mich about it.. and she said, I made a wrong decision from the start. I don't wanna regret, again. Because I really do appreciate this love. I don't know what to do now.. go with the flow? And before I spit everything out to her, I had a "xin li ce yan." The last one was super right, I had a lot of worries right now.. And I don't know what to do to solve them?

That day at computer lab, I was playing Doodlejump, Kenny was sitting next to me. He saw me very nervous playing then he said, "You can't even handle your own life." I think that's true, I don't know how to handle my own life. I'm lost.. No guide. I think it will take me sometime to get out of the circle by myself. I don't need help. Let me fall, even if I cry, I will try to stand up again, by myself. I need to feel the pain and endure it. This is life. When life gives you lemon, make your own lemonade juice! (Although I hate lemon!)

I feel like eating non stop right now. I want ice cream but I am already sick from eating too much, my voice changed a bit cause of a bit flu? I'm having cough right now but this is small matter. I am strong!

cotton candy.

What more to blog about my life? And I effing wish the maid faster come, I really can't wait anymore, doing house chores is a total torture for me.. I watched finish "The Last Song" this afternoon, like finally.. I think the movie, is okay. The guy and the girl so sweet? Cause they're real lovers in real life :) I always thought I have deja vu lately but no, it happens to be that I've seen those things somewhere around the corner in my house. Blah, what's with my mind?

I am getting tired and sick of this life. I'm still finding the real reason, why I've been holding on for so long.. What keeps me here, waiting all this time? I need to find it out. Wish that the answer I found will be.. logic enough for me to accept too.

And, I realize, I have a craving for flats and sneakers now! I want more! My cravings list, cancelled out quite a lot already this year.. kinda happy :) 4 more days till grow up. 6 more days till uncle leave. Why does time flies so fast? In a blink of an eye. I want to stop everything right now. If only I could (:

I thought a lot of stuffs to blog before I went on but when I'm blogging, all of them went *poof* in my mind. dingdongding ~

; What will happen if one day, I am forced to leave your side, but my heart still stays?

/xx.

Determination. :)

2010-10-05T15:50:00.003+08:00

Halo! :D

I'm here to update my blog again. I finally got time to settle down. I think I'm gonna sweep outside later again, backyard is full of leaves again! All because of the starfruit tree, this tree is good at dropping leaves and it's bearing plenty of fruits now. It's fruit season? Daddy plant de longan tree also got longan already ~

I've been eating ice creams everyday! I feel happy, super happy. Mummy bought snacks non stop, ice cream and a plastic of junk foods. I tried to stop myself from eating, resist the temptation, don't look at it and I don't feel like eating anymore (: I am good at controlling myself, getting better but ice cream? I'm deeply in love with it. Currently missing Bulla's Cookie & Cream and Ben & Jerry's! :(

I wanted all of these! fat die ah =p

I want a bookshelf like this :D

I have been really busy, I don't know why. Maybe cause I have to do house works too, sigh. It's somehow good too, I guess.

Yesterday afternoon, I saw Ryan Chua! Why is he so cute? I didn't saw him at first and he smiled at me first, for the very first time! Happy die me! Then he kept turning around and smile at me. Then I hug him and asked, "Why no find me chat in Facebook liao?" He looked up at me and smiled shyly then he ran away with his friends. He did not ignore me for the very first time!

Had a really funny conversation with ceejayhej and michelle. No, it's michelle who heard our conversation and joined us. It was hilarious lo, I don't know why I brought up this topic when I was sitting with him. So fast think for future already? Slowly ; one by one, don't rush! But I still think babies are cute lo :D

I got vampire teeth! I got 4. I like the korean girl's teeth in the movie, then I keep telling daddy. Then daddy said, "Oh... yuan lai, you like de is this type?" (sounds wrong, I'm not lesbian) then I said, "yeah, very nice!" Daddy said, "but you got many laoo hu ya." Toink!!

There's a lot more to say but I just couldn't find a way.. of how to express it and say it out. I couldn't find the right word, but it's okay, it's better to keep it all to myself. Don't create a distance . Does it have to change? I don't like it this way. I miss the old times. I am starting to feel confuse right now. What's with me... now?

Everything suppose to end here, full stop.

/xx.

Define love.

2010-10-02T19:46:00.007+08:00

I am blogging again, ah. I just felt like it (: can't control when the mood of blogging comes.

I rushed to computer lab during recess to finish my flash but jane ended up helping others and EJ came. xD She keep asking me if I needed help. She's over friendly and lesterchan keeps laughing only! PE was super tiring okay.. What happen to my stamina? Become so lauya =S Tomorrow tasek with mich? I haven't have her reply yet but daddy has been going almost everyday so I'll be following him, I guess? :) I wanna train 1500m, I hope 1 week time is enough.

I skipped one period of chinese class with jane. Thanks for her help, I managed to finish my flash in time! She say my drawings so cute, HAHA! I also think so :p Finish le, then wanted to go out find teacher, I opened the door and Teacher Patrick just walked pass me! Then I called him. This is fate or coincidence? =P

Went home, uncle made sushi. I keep eat eat eat non stop, full die me :(

eat till scared already!

After lunch, I bath. Then, see sis play her laptop, she's addicted to Twitter cause of me! :p as if I got that big influence lo but I created her account :D She's crazy over Koreans and uncle kept teasing her non stop. It was only me, her and uncle left in kitchen during lunch, they two keep fighting non stop, I keep laughing! Their conversation, funny die ~

Then I prepared for tuition. I straightened my hair properly today, look so nice! I love my hair today, long and straight! Wheee. I was lazy to curl it ~

I have colorful nails! :b

In tuition, Goo said maybe we are related, seriously? He said we might have the same ancestor! Not bad la :p But why my maths so weak? Sigh. And then teacher said he got secretly read his daughter's blog! Won't angry cai guai ~ I am going to start Chem next week! I still can't find Physics tuition. Why so hard? Oh and daddy asked me to find a group of "study friends" and go out study. HAHAHA, who want join me? But you must be smart enough so can teach me =p

Had a lot of sensitive topics today, why uncle, mum and dad all tell me to stop right now? What a coincidence. I will prove it, that I can.. just that I need some time (: trust me, this time! I will improve..

and what's with the SNSD and 2PM rumor that they are in Brunei? It's flooding my twitter homepage and I love the new twitter! Damn cool can! :D Follow me! http://twitter.com/kwanghoe

till heres.

/xx.

It should never be like this .

2010-10-01T11:03:00.006+08:00

Hi hi hi :) It's heartbreaking to see my blog dead so I'm back again!

I want this shirt, I think I've seen this somewhere before too..

Yesterday was the last day of September! *Wake me up when september ends* So today is the first day of October :D I love October! 10 days left!

It's still early now. I woke up super early cause I had a nightmare. Wth dream is that? I dreamt of X and a lot of people. Michelle, jane and sas peoples?! Super weird. And a ghost who is hunting for me? I wish I can stop dreaming that something's gonna eat me :(

So the other day, I went to jane's house to do my flash after afternoon class with mich and vk. We talked while doing.. talked quite a lot of stuffs, I forgot what we actually talked about already..

Then yesterday was teacher's day celebration. It was boring.. And I forgot who was it singing on stage and the guy sitting beside me say he can sing like JB (Justin Bieber) oh! I wonder who said that, the face so thick :p and he said he scare he sing liao, everyone want chase him? It ended early and so we can go home early :D

After that reached home, bath and did my flash. I think it will takes me 2 days to finish it :) Because my flash is simple and I did fireflies ~ I listened to the song almost more than 100 times! And I think uncle listen till sien liao :p cause I keep playing it ~ Then he come and see my flash, he said, "What is that? Do you know how does fireflies look like? Know or not? It's not like this ba." I replied, "It's just a project ba. And I know how it looks like. Just simply do and can pass up enough le." He agreed and walked away.

Then do till half, C messaged me and asked me to online. I thought what and oh, it's about the present he wanted to give me for my birthday. He bought me pink earpiece, it's heartbeat by lady gaga! I saw the picture, quite nice but it will be late so he ask if I can wait xD And blah blah blah :D Then his msn name, dp, font and font colour same like mine?!

I sleep early nowadays, I want eye bags to be gone and sleeping early is good (Y) I'm a person who needs like 8-9 hours of sleep! Love sleeping (:

I think uncle extend his flight back, yay! He'll be leaving on 10+ which I don't know when, which is good, I hope he could stay longer. Daddy keep encouraging me to learn how to make ice cream and yoghurt from uncle :D So I can eat whenever I want which is a so not good thing.

till heres, I don't know what to blog anymore :p

/xx.

What am I to you?

2010-09-28T15:09:00.005+08:00

Miss me? Haven't touch my laptop for days, I can live without internet (:

Just quite many days no touch laptop, no sign in facebook, tumblr, twitter & blogger, my facebook friend request almost 100? WOW. I'm shock ~

I woke up 3 times this morning, felt so hot, I don't know why then I couldn't stand it anymore and went to bath. I saw something I shouldn't see, I kept it inside, thinking maybe it's not like what I think. And then, I found out something myself again. Honesty.. Where is the trust?

Since you're doing things like this, then why I cannot? Sometimes, I feel like giving up.. It's hard if I'm the only one whose giving.. It's not fair like this. What am I to you? I know, it doesn't matter, it's not a big deal but I can't stop myself from thinking so much. I will do whatever I want from now on, I don't care anymore. This is it..

I ate ice cream non stop just now, calm myself down, stop myself from thinking too much. I'm currently chatting with C and V. I wanna go on and find someone to talk and V chatted with me. After chatting with him, felt a bit bit bit better.

I won't be updating much, been really busy.. I'm updating these 2 post today and just to inform I'm gonna be gone.. And it feels so nice to get to disappear from the online world for quite many days, love it ~ don't have to see things I shouldn't see.

till heres.

/xx.

Happy Birthday Daddy! :)

2010-09-27T14:53:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthday Daddy! :)

gave daddy a surprise after dinner, he was so concentrating watching the korean drama and his 5 daughters walked out of the kitchen holding a cake :p he was like =O so funny lah.

iloveyou, always. live long! teehee. wish whatever you wish will come true, 85! old liao oh!

and after daddy's birthday, it means, my birthday is coming soon!

/xx.

Would you believe me? Just for once.

2010-09-23T17:22:00.006+08:00

Hi readers. :D

Today is a super gloomy day in the afternoon. :)

It was sunny in the morning. Oh, and this morning 4 of my sisters got bombed by me in the car, really very pissed off but I calm down afterwards. Then in car to school, all of them kept quiet. My temper very good one ok, just that sometimes.. I don't know how to say.. skip skip.

Today is a fun day! Had 2 practicals today, Chemistry and Biology, but Biology wasn't that fun. Chemistry, we had titration, pink is the colour! :) It's pretty *drools* Baby and I are in the same group.

Then it was Biology. This is the most disgusting lesson ever, I swear. We had to dissect cow's heart and just by looking at it, could make me feel like puking already, in fact, it has a really weird smell, it stinks. :( Baby also think it stinks. I guess Jasmond was having lots of fun! Mad digusting ttm. Poor cow's heart being played like a toy! Yuck ~ I think other people will upload pictures of it so I'll just skip it and I didn't dare to take picture, gali =S

So, I went home and bathed with cold water. I wonder why today's weather so hot! After bathing, I still feel hot so I on the air cond. Feels much more better. Then I decided to mask! :D Since I got nothing to do..

walnut & pine nut :)

smells so nice! I love this mask.

Then during masking, thunder started to boom boom non stop, super loud and scary. At first when I heard it, I still hesitate if it's thunder or not or something fall. But in the end, it was thunder. Thunder non stop then it started to rained heavily.. Gloomy weather is love :D

I wanted to nap and the weather is so comfortable to sleep in but I decided not to if not tonight insomnia again, I hate it, so didn't sleep tio instead I played choi dai ti with sis, I win 2 rounds nia and guess what I said? "win me! loo sa! (loser)" Then my sis keep laughing. I am still lauya in choi dai ti, anyone wanna teach me how to play? HAHA :P

I'm feeling super hungry now.. Can't wait for dinner.

that's all for today, I guess? :) Lazy to think anymore, super tired.

Baby, do you love that blog I made? I know you do! Wheee (:

/xx.

Happy Moon cake festival :D

2010-09-22T18:18:00.006+08:00

I woke up late. Sis woke me up and I saw two her? Eyes so blur. Something's wrong with my eyes recently, keep see wrong stuffs and he kept laughing at me, damn bad de! Don't know why every morning can't wake up. This morning, no aircon, I also slept like a pig! I slept early also no use. And had super weird dream this morning, I think I went to fantasy land, known as rainbowland :D

I failed physics. I am gonna find tuition for physics, gonna tell mummy I got tuition for chemistry already and this month, no tuition add maths? luckily I understand the topic matrix!

Parents are back! Uncle was the one whose fetching and sending us to school. First day parents go thailand, many unlucky things happened. Uncle was sighing in the car when he fetch me back from afternoon class when it was me and him only. And I keep laughing non stop! How can so soi one? Then, he said, early morning saw news, the "red shirt communist" of thailand went to Bangkok! Soi dao..? Speechless. Luckily parents got keep call home :)

Was busy yesterday, whole day no touch until laptop. Uncle fetch me and sis from afternoon class, he asked, "want buy ice cream?" He brought us to buy. Then went back home. Showered and ate ice cream. Yumyum ~ Played choi dai ti with sis, first time playing! Not bad ma =p Although I did a lot of stupid things. After playing for a while, sis came back and brought us to airport to fetch parents back. They said they saw live "red shirt" communist, just in front of their hotel's door. Daddy asked mummy to record as memories but mummy don't want HAHA!

My knee is swollen, pain die me, pain pain! :( I accidentally hit the car door ~

Mummy bought nail polishes, and my nails now has 10 different colours.

hawaiian pants? :D

Lastly,

Happy Moon Cake Festival Everyone! :)

till heres.

I'm super busy also today, seems like time is not enough for me.

/xx.

0920

2010-09-20T19:46:00.004+08:00

Please don't wait for your prize, hahah! 1st with you (:

more to come? :D

iloveyou. wan ♥

and I made sushi today! yay!

/xx.

I don't need any happy endings ;

2010-09-19T20:44:00.005+08:00

I feel so bad right now.. cause I can't upload the "Be happy" photo! My instincts tells me that something bad will happen, I don't know why. I hope everything will be going smoothly :( 请保佑一切都会没事的.. =/

Last night, C chat with me last night and asked for my birthday, then he said he wanna give me presents, he tu ran liang xin fa xian ~ so nice? HAHA :D He just chat with me just now to tell me what happen on his today's outdoor activity and he went to sleep. SO EARLY? I also want :( Then said quite a lot of stuffs, but mostly, is him complaining how sad is his life. Then, another one is ask for my number. I think this world, is going to end soon, 2012? And he treats me like his gf.. Wuliao ttm.

Parents left for Thailand already, I wonder how are they right now and what are they doing.. Is mummy shopping like usual? And daddy complaining that his legs very tired? xD I don't need any gifts, just hoping they'll come back safely (:

Afternoon, suddenly have the guts to walk there and asked. Don't ask me why. After that, went out to get letter, came back and played badminton with uncle. I hit with my full force non stop, release stress! I'm very stress lately, jane and mich knows why. Poor shuttlecock ~

Tomorrow is the day! I'm happy cause I've finished all of my homework! Including POA except for Computer Project, I really don't know what to do. I might either go to jane's house or ask her to come to my house and do. Whee ~ She's my love, my love and my knight in armor! I love you :D

Are you excited for school tomorrow? :) I hope tonight won't insomnia and end up sleeping at early morning!

till heres.

/xx.

Don't find love, it'll find you ;

2010-09-18T16:39:00.006+08:00

Once upon a time...

They say every tear has it's reason, every smile has it's own season.

Make me stay. Say something sweet and tender and untrue and make me stay.

Never say goodbye when you still want to try. Never give up when you still feel you can take it. Never say you don't love a person when you can't let go.

One reason why I love tumblr so much :)

Tumblr reaching 30 followers already! left 1 more and vuala! While Twitter, I don't know why I lose like 1 follower these 2 days, why unfollow me?! So sad :( But I have 3 new follower request! :D

I hope everything will be okay! Parents leaving to Thailand tomorrow already, early in the morning, I bet I can't wake up to send them off to airport.

And, have you guys realize that Facebook got new relationship status already? It's Separated and Divorced. I wonder who will put that as their status, lol. LDM ~

Dots dots dots . Last night, S find me chat. I find him really weird and funny at some way..Then someone go make fun of him, so bad but funny. Still complicated with V, luckily talked to jane about it, thanks for Mr Power's advice.

School's reopening soon. 1 more day left! Someone's excited :D I wonder who ~ Homework homework? POA will be done tonight, hopefully. I didn't do Computer project yet, don't know how, feel like walking there and ask for help but so shy. Jane taught me how to install only. :<

My tummy is zuo fan-ing with me right now. I have a weird and crazy tummy, it has it's up and down also. Fed up with it! :( I'm sorry for making it sad also, Haha!

this is what I have for today! and curry for dinner.

I'm done, feeling super lazy today. Baby asked me to update so here I am, updating..

till heres.

/xx.

Can't move anymore ;

2010-09-17T23:07:00.003+08:00

Woke up, did the same thing again.. Tomorrow gonna go ICC because mum's friend asked us to go there and have lunch. I don't wanna go but then mum say her friend invited all of us, as in family to go so must go. Sui bian ba ~

Had nasi lemak and mixed berries yoghurt as lunch and thien thien chicken rice as dinner just now. Full die me :( My tummy so weird again! Dots dots.

Yesterday night was.. another shocking night? Y told me he ..... I was shocked. But we're still buddy :) And then chatted with V.. He asked me something and I don't know what to answer and the conversation goes on till I told him I wanna sleep.. I don't know what to tell him anymore. Things is getting more and more complicated now. I'm lost too.

I don't know what to do anymore . I don't wanna hurt him anymore.. *bangs wall*

I wish someone could tell me everything will be okay ;

till heres.

/xx.

That's not love .

2010-09-16T20:54:00.006+08:00

I don't know what to say today, time pass by quite fast today.. maybe cause I keep thinking of stuffs today, really gonna fa shen jing soon. I'm stuck in between. I can neither go forward or go back a step.. I really don't know what to do now. And now, I wish he didn't say that it's me.

那麽我们就到这里你说好吗

反正你会说的也只剩谎话

太多人分这句Honey

就像蛋糕爬满了蚂蚁

越美丽我只会越伤心

Oh baby

那些不够爱的爱别再说是爱

我也不再是只要糖果的小女孩

爱不能分配只能很纯粹

纯粹的只给一个谁

那些到处爱的爱别再说是爱

故事也不会永远只照你的剧本拍

流过的泪是毕业前的学费

爱只给一个谁

欺骗是你自然的天性对不对

所以傻傻的等错怪我对不对

太多任意当做天性

就像不满XX的声音

越好奇我只会越伤心

你永远空洞的自毁却让别人去感觉

我要的只是歌生夜,

安安静静的,星空下两个人座位

我的笑只要给我一个最新的怀抱

那不是爱 baby 那不是爱

/xx.

The last ;

2010-09-15T22:45:00.006+08:00

Hello! :D

do you know what to do now? ;)

Woke up super late this morning, alarm doesn't work for me, never. I set 9.30am but ended up 11am woke up. Then I went to shower cause going out after lunch then I went in toilet just realize, it's raining! No wonder I keep sleeping till so late :D

Then, I ate lunch and went out. It was raining.. what a nice weather. Then I meet up with the girls, mich couldn't make it. So yeah, it's only the 5 of us, girls day out! I haven't see jia for a long time, jane left quite early. It was nice see-ing them again. :D

Pass by cinema, saw a trailer. Wilber Pan's face appeared which caught my attention and then Jay Chow? The movie seems so nice then I looked at jane and she looked at me and we both said we wanna watch at the same time, talk about coincidence! The movie looks so nice, can't wait :D It's Jay Chow's movie, coming soon already! Many good looking guys acting in it, good for eyes =D Hahaha!

Then I stayed in the book shop with jia and reych till my car came and we walked out together :) Jia said she will miss my naked shoes! Dots dots dots ~ On the car, talked about relationships stuffs. This topic again ~ Daddy said, "Gai fang qi de shi hou jiu gai fang qi." I think this is true.

Went to tuition! My 7 years tuition :) I went up, everything change already. Sigh. How long haven't I been there? Then, the teacher, looks blur when she saw me, after a few seconds, she nod and smiled at me.

Saw something when I came home on Facebook.. Hmm? Then I called mich and talked for half an hour.. Spilled out. (:

till heres, I'm tired and my tummy's having a party right now, I guess? :/

/xx.

I dropped a tear in the ocean ;

2010-09-14T21:43:00.006+08:00

Hi. :)

Had a few weird dreams this morning. I dreamt of X, shock die me. Okay, skip. Then I did a lot of house work today! I'm such a good daughter! :) I'm also practicing how to be a good housewife in the future ~ but someone said he sacrificed himself, so damn hurt :(

I washed the clothes, hanged the clothes to dry, folded clothes (mummy said I'm fast and I folded everyone's clothes by myself and put them in everyone's closet by throwing, hahaha), peeled potato's skin, helped mum out in the kitchen, fried potatoes and cleaned my room's floor (:

Uncle sleeping over at 4th uncle's house from tonight for 3 days? But his last destination is gonna be our house again (: His gonna fetch uncle and aunt from airport later.

Parents confirmed flying to Thailand already and I'm not following.. *sobs* this can be my reason to go Singapore alone! Then just now, mummy asked, "Got want anything from Thailand?" Me: "Shirts!" But definitely those that will shrink into smaller size ones!

Just now dinner, mum cooked. The food is nice, although I'm full, I still keep eating and ends up tummy ache. :S

Tomorrow mall with the girls! I'm waiting for mich's phone call right now, or her dad forgot to ask her to phone back? I'll call her tomorrow morning then.

till heres.

/xx.

A day away from the city ;

2010-09-13T15:28:00.002+08:00

This morning my sister woke me up. She came into my room and pulled my blanket and said, "Go seria now. Go shower!" She pulled a few times and I still don't wanna wake up then after w while I went to bath ~

Then, I charged my phone, laptop and camera. Sisters charged their PSP and NDS. After charging for an hour, we left and started the journey. Uncle and mummy non stop talking about past.. reminisce the past! I enjoyed listening to their stories.

After an hour or so, we reached there :) Had the best lunch ever! (Y) I love the foods my yi po cook! So delicious, reminds me a lot of childhood memories. Kampung foods :D Then after lunch, see photo album again! Today is the first time ever in my whole life, I get to see my grandpa, through photos.. Grandpa so yentao! And I saw mummy's kid pictures! Past (: Those photos are so valuable, all 30 years old plus already! Memories haven't fade ;

I really wonder how does it feels to have grandparents around. Must be nice, can manja with them and all... never really get to know how does it feels like. Appreciate with what you have now not until they're gone and all you can do is just regret..

After that, I played my laptop for an hour in the living room alone while sisters and cousins outside playing. I was chatting with him and he said Brunei is raining but it isn't raining there, just a few raindrops falling from the sky. Someone secretly took my photo! *SPIES* I didn't know he took my photo till he left an offline message to me in MSN and ask me to check it in Facebook. After that, I went offline and decided to go out and smell fresh air :D

the farm next to cousin's house.

me hugging my baby ~

I seriously don't know this photo was taken, funny picture of me!

walking along the empty street.

flowers.

pink!

it's pink ~

my ring :D

dark & light.

we pick flowers ~

gloomy ; rain drops started to fall but not heavy rain (:

HAHAHA.

pretty flowers ~

they were finding grasshopper!

nice view (Y)

yuck!

grasshopper. =S

mad disgusting! :(

We left at 6pm and reached home almost 7.30pm. On the way home, mummy said uncle wanna go live there for a few days. I wanna go there again, so relaxing (:

I spend a day away from the city. Feels not bad. :D

till heres.

/xx.

Conflicts ;

2010-09-11T14:24:00.005+08:00

Didn't blog yesterday cause I was lazy. Badminton in the evening for an hour plus. :) Cousins from KB came to our house to see US uncle. The whole day yesterday eating snacks non stop! Skittles and M&Ms. :O

yummy! :D

colorful.

M&Ms & Skittles! Bought almost 20 packets of them and they're finished by today :)

Uncle shocked when he saw the price of Skittles in Brunei cause in US, it's way more cheaper. And he said next time, his gonna buy a lot for me when he come back! :D

And, today is a wonderful day (:

I woke up at 10.30, went to bath. Then, went down, ate lunch immediately. This morning, I washed everyone's clothes :D I feel so proud of myself. I set the washing machine and put the detergent in myself! Happy me! I think I can live on my own (:

Then, after lunch, stayed at home a while and then parents going out. They asked if I wanna follow them, so I followed. First, went to see the house land in Jangsak :) The view there is so nice! On the way there, the sky is gloomy and a bit sunny. I love that area. Then, we're on top on the area, I can see the other place is raining! So nice! And we reached the house there. Parents and uncle went down, me and 2 sisters stayed in the car. We opened the door and realized is super windy! The wind is cold and it feels so nice (: Breeze blowing.. Then, after I took the first picture, I saw lightning then heard thunder..

I love the feeling, it just feels so amazing. I don't know why.. Enjoyed the wind for quite some time with sisters :) I love the breeze! I wanna go to the beach :( and then mummy decided to just go to Bunut Hua Ho to buy grocery stuffs. I bought yoghurt, mummy bought chocolates, uncle bought sushi stuffs :)

After that, we went to cousin's house which is nearby there. Parents talked outside, I stayed in the TV room with cousins, watching TV then suddenly they come in and talked. Suddenly, uncle say cousin only know how to say "iloveyou" then I felt awkward.. Then they asked me something about the girls whose chasing cousin right now. Laugh die me ~ Then, cousin went out to play bball with two uncle, I followed but just watched them play cause it was raining. Then uncle asked me to play but just shooting only =D It was nice, playing bball under the rain. (:

I shoot in a lot of times! US uncle keep teasing me non stop. Say I got 3 eye and I'm miss mata-mata and he call me korean girl. And say my shooting is kampung style? My cousin keep laughing at me non stop. Dots dots dots. Uncle thinks I look like korean! Not bad ma ~ Hahaha!

I skipped dinner today, no appetite, not hungry, don't wanna eat. Mummy keep asking if I wanna eat or not, so she'll cook for me but I'm really not hungry at all. Mummy asked me almost more than 10 times.

Just now, took out old photos album and see again. I realize, my grandmother, every picture, she's carrying me! Mummy say she very sayang me. :D Cause I'm the youngest baby. Then uncle say, "yeahlor. You last time sibeh cute de leh. Everyone thinks that when you grow up sure very pretty de..."

Tomorrow, tasek in the evening? Wednesday, Mall with the girls? Yes no yes no? I don't know.

And to that person, thanks for caring, I'm really okay. Just shocked when I saw your message just now, never knew you still cared about me. (:

till heres.

/xx.

Peace ; Love ; Dream !

2010-09-10T17:05:00.012+08:00

Hi readers :)

Last night, chat till late midnight. Fire crackers and fireworks non stop these day? Especially my neighbor. So kiasu? He almost everyday put, never mind hor like that, but then he choose sibeh nice de time, during midnight! Last night is the worse of all. He put non stop, I feel like my roof is gonna fly away! Keep boom boom boom ~ Hope tonight won't put again! =S

This morning, woke up kinda early. Daddy came in, turn on lights, keep saying, "wake up le! go eat dim sum. faster go shower." Then, he pull my blanket but I just keep sleeping till he say, "oii, wake up le oh! we want go liao." I just dragged my tired body to the toilet and shower. I decided to wear the shirt uncle bought from U.S since his been asking why we no wear. I love that shirt :)

We went to eat dim sum at Dynasty Restaurant. Saw jolene and huan ni :D We ate and talk talk, uncle keep teasing sister! Laugh die me. His so damn good at insulting people! Always make me laugh non stop. Daddy said my fringe is long already and need to cut but I think it's not! Then uncle say, "Don't cut! Your fringe long right? Then you can sleep at class and the teacher won't know cause your fringe covering your eyes..." Everyone laughed.

After eating, we walked to The Mall. So empty! And many shops in Gadong no open. It's quiet because today is the first day of Raya (: Then we shopped and I bought M&M`s and Skittles. Parents both say, "Eh, still buy chocolate? Later grow more pimple." Dots dots..

On the way home, my simpang there, the road got one super super duper big monitor lizard! Then it crawl in front of us, daddy stopped to let it cross. I opened the window and "psssst" it :D Then it "pssst" a few times back, it even stick it's tongue out and I made it crawl into someone's house! Oooopsie!

In the afternoon, talked on the phone with the lauya for 15 minutes or more. He is so bad *sobs*

Testing my new camera :D

MacBook. love the wallpaper!

sis's watch! got 3 color, white, pink and transparent. it's ODM's watch! I want!

He gave us hair clips too. This one mad cute :D

the shirt he bought! just realize, my hair is long already :O

peace ; love ; dream .

Good news is I've finished most of the holiday homework already and I'm left with POA! Waiting for sis to photocopy and teach me how to do it :) Then after finish my homework, I'm gonna start reading The Host!

Been playing badminton a lot lately. Gonna start jogging soon!

ps; I hate the feeling of going to someone's blog and find it not updated. :(

pps; 2ne1's new album is nice (Y)

till heres.

/xx.

Rainbow ; Black & White .

2010-09-08T19:41:00.002+08:00

It's almost 9am, and I'm awake for almost an hour already. I hate the fact that my sleep gets distracted all the time, couldn't sleep in peace for 2 nights straight. The reason why I'm up so early now is because mummy wants me to show a video for uncle to see and when I got down, they're gone, they went out already. Sometimes, I really don't get it..

The other night, slept at 4am cause listened to uncle's stories about the past :) My grandmother passed away when I was 1 month old, I've never seen her before.. Then we were looking at the photo album. Oh my ~ My short hair photos, really so speechless. And I realize, in this picture I have long hair then next picture short hair. What? I didn't even remember I keep changing hairstyle! Priceless funny photos of mine!

I'm stuck at home.. Tonight, go or don't go? Ha ha, even uncle ask ask, not bored meh? LOL. I keep complaining to daddy and he bought lots of DVD but it's all fighting one. I hate fighting movie, violence is a big no for me. Ever since uncle came back, my days is filled with laughter, it's no longer gloomy and dark. I've been laughing non stop. He'll be back during October, just few days before my birthday.

I wanna call now but afraid to interrupt his sleep and it's still early.. so I might call after I finish bathing. I'm gonna go bath soon! :)

/xx.

Slow like a snail ;

2010-09-07T22:31:00.003+08:00

I can hear thunder now, it's super duper extra loud than the normal one.. Scary! It keeps boom-ing non stop! Thunder definitely is not my thing. What a sad night although I love rainy nights :(

I did nothing for the whole day. I really wonder how time flies. But I talked with mich on the phone for like an hour plus? She said I became more ben already ~ And I asked big sister to call Chemistry tuition teacher, Chemistry tuition, here I come?

Uncle came back from U.S already! He bought a lot of bags, perfumes for mummy, toys for my 2 sister, shirts. Most of all, my camera :D

I'll blog more tomorrow, feeling rather down and lazy tonight. I wonder why :/

/xx.

Wouldn't change a thing ;

2010-09-06T20:33:00.003+08:00

Good news! Uncle said he got extra maid so he brought his maid, so I have maid now! She's gonna be working for us till my new maid come. So the whole afternoon, my sister was telling her what to do, I was bored. So I begged my sister to play badminton with me, I keep picking up the ball?! Then she don't wanna play liao. I planned to play for 2 hours but end up playing for 15 minutes only =(

A random, desperate guy inbox me in Facebook and keep asking me to accept his friend request! His scary and I think his bian tai. HAHAHAHAHA! His inbox message, laugh die me!

Hey you, silly, why are you so sweet last night? You know, I was smiling the whole night because of you. :) I haven't update our blog yet, lazy lazy lazy me! I will update soon, just afraid I'll forgot.

Oh, this morning I got a weird call. I was washing plates then I felt my phone vibrating. And when I look, the call just finished. I was wondering who so I called back. Then, it's from Belait's school. I told her she called the wrong number. But then, she keep calling me back again! She called for like 4-5 times but I didn't answer. Then guess what? She used another number to call me. So jobless meh? And I ignored but after a few times, I answered. Then, she asked me, "Di mana sini?" I answered, "Bandar seri begawan." She replied, "Oh, sorry, wrong number." WTH? She called so many times just to ask me that? ==" TOINK!

Parents asked me to stop facing lappy every single day for hours. I can't help it because I really don't know what to do other than going online and read stuffs. My life is boring! Then I answered daddy, "Then what should I do? Plant flower?" He asked me to go sweep floor! Lifeless me :(

Tomorrow's the day, everyone is excited ~

/xx.

Invisible tears ;

2010-09-05T15:44:00.008+08:00

I finished watching PS Man already, the ending not that bad but not sweet enough for me. A bit disappointed but oh well, process is the most important thing :) I think I'm gonna go for movie marathon already! There's like a few movies I wanna watch when I searched for 2010 Taiwan drama! I wanna watch "Scent of love!" The actors are, urm, good looking and it's only 11 episodes! Can finish within 2 days :D I'm gonna be gone soon!

I ran out of words to say and things to blog now.

Invisible tears!

Yes, I do worry a lot.

I'm FINE, has a deep meaning :)

Reasons why most people say "Nothing" when asked "What's wrong?"

; They don't feel like explaining because they're afraid you won't understand.

; It'll make them feel worse if they do because the subject is being brought up again.

; They don't know what's wrong.

; Privacy or Personal space.

; Afraid of being judged.

; They don't want anyone worrying about them.

; Tired of hearing the lie that "It'll be alright."

; It's obviously about you.

; They just don't wanna talk about it.

I think it's true because I always say "I'm okay, I'm fine, Nothing" when the truth is, I'm not okay. Da da da, I can't control my mind sometimes. It goes over the limit where even me, myself don't know why am I thinking so much nonsense. Sometimes, I wish I could just shut my mind down and keep it in a peace condition (:

INSECURE & WORRY.. 你给我不足的安全感, 没关系, 我早已习惯了. 我会努力试着不要想太多, 我不想你为我担心. 我怕是我忘了如何去爱一个人.

Talked on the phone with mich last night, talked a lot of stuffs.. She's more complicated than me can? I told you how ler, it's up to you to decide (: Stupid joel and lingyong played me on the phone!? What Alibaba then suddenly is joel suddenly is lingyong, then they asked me something, I answered wrongly and all I can hear is their laughters behind the phone. Xi guan jiu hao :D

I am bored, currently messaging with him. Dots dots dots. And he created a tumblr account last night! My 23rd follower on tumblr! :D What a coincidence..

1 more day!! I can't wait anymore!! Faster come back please ~ Uncle chatted with me the other night. I told him that I wanna learn yoghurt and he asked me, "Why in a sudden you wanna learn how to make yoghurt?" I replied, "I wanna learn ma.." Then he nagged that I'm a big girl should know how to cook and all then he end with, "all in all, only expertise you have is to place an order." Dots dots dots, speechless.. I ask him to buy camera cover, he ask me to use the sewing machine for the dolls clothes he bought for my sisters, and sew the cover myself! What a nice advice. LOL!

Please keep my tagboard alive, thank you :D

/xx.

Is it hard to be naive in this world?

2010-09-03T13:44:00.006+08:00

I believe in miracles :)

Does my blog still looks dull now? I've added some small icons in the sidebar. It took me 10 minutes! I hope it looks nice right now :) I don't know how to put a picture on the header, dots dots dots. My laptop can't change blog skin one! So stupid :/

I abandoned my Chinese work there, it's left there on the table beside me.. I actually decide to finish it and just play laptop but I can't seem to control myself. This sucks. I wanna finish all my works faster so I can enjoy faster :D

What I wanna do in this holiday...

; learn how to make yoghurt.

; finish reading "The Host."

; complete all holiday homework except for Chemistry.

; watch all the movies I've wanted to watch, PS Man and You're Beautiful.

; learn how to bake cake, cookies and egg tarts.

; be less lazy.

I want more and more chocolates.. M&M, Dairy and ice cream! Currently craving for them!

This morning, sis asked me to figure how to open this wooden box thing present a guy gave her. It took me so long and I used a cheat way. I keep shaking shaking till the thing fall out :D I'm so smart! I want to buy this wooden box too! I want it so badly but it's not selling anymore =/

Watched "Will it snow for christmas" just now. The guy was so sweet, I was laughing to myself non stop when the guy hugged her and proposed to her. Then daddy ask, what happen to me, why I keep laughing to myself. I love being silly :D

I've finished BM holiday homework already, 4 more to go ~

3 more days and uncle is coming back with my camera! :D

/xx.

Not blaming you..

2010-09-02T17:57:00.008+08:00

Happy Holidays everyone :)

But what's the point of having tons of homework during the holiday? Holiday are meant to be for us students, to relax and release stress but teachers just oh so love to give us holiday homework! Then it's totally pointless of having a holiday, dots dots dots..

I like "Will it snow for christmas's OST" especially those piano ones I've downloaded last week :D I think the times it's been played is more than 100! It's my lullaby (: Makes me feel so peaceful but let me think a lot of stuffs..

Okay, so his away for dinner and the other one is off to shower, no one is chatting with me now so I can concentrate on blogging now :)

I think I'm getting better at doing house chores like washing the plates and I think I'm gonna help by sweeping or mopping the floor tomorrow :) but I think it's a bit impossible? Doing house chores also can exercise =D It's good (Y) especially during early morning! Yesterday afternoon, daddy show off in the car. He said he swept the house and cleaned the turtle's pond. When reached home, I looked out of the window, the floor there a big pile of leaves. I asked, "why got leaves one? you swept already, not meh?" *gets down from car and see* daddy, "eh?! why got leaves one?? I just now sweep don't have leh.." I laughed ~ I wonder when is the new maid coming, faster come please!

And I changed my blogskin already! So I got comments that it's dull and all cause I really can't find something nice, I think I'm gonna find a big big picture and put it as my background. It's fonts are colourful but background so dull? I spend an hour or so editing it in the afternoon when I've got nothing to do..

Tummy aching like hell since afternoon :S I don't know what happen, pain die me! Pain till I wanna roll on the floor non stop or bang my head on the table or wall. Yes, it's that pain. Ouch* I'm still feeling not so good right now, I think I'm getting sick soon..

To do list, I wanna make one too! Planning for this holiday :)

I like her nails :D

this is so cute!!

lastly, end with something I love and have been talking about with him, clover (:

I wanna find clover, heard people say, whoever who found clover, is lucky..

During Biology period today, teacher showed us a video, I didn't watch it! Too gross and disgusting, I cannot stand it, I think I will puke if I watch so I turned around.. Teacher say she's gonna let us dissect the heart too! EWW TTM :( I don't have the guts to dissect, I don't even dare to kill insects, in fact, it's dissecting a heart? YUCK.. I won't dissect it, no matter what :/

Apple has launched three new gadgets again today! http://www.apple.com/ipod/ - to check :) Ipod touch is nice! Can video call plus it has camera also.. I want :D

"I was wrong to let you walk out of my life. I was dumb to think that I could survive."

"I don't want to feel sad but that's the only way to know what is Happy."

"Sometimes, you really just don't know what to say. Because what you really want to say is; is just something you can't say." (Y)

"When I say "I'm okay" sometimes that means I'm not okay and I mean I'm okay when you're with me."

"We're like strangers now. But you know what the sad part is? We used to talk everyday."

/xx.

If love is the answer, could you please repeat the question?

2010-09-01T16:47:00.007+08:00

Da da da, 2nd day without maid ? I still survive :D I washed my own plates, it's a miracle! I also helped, um, fold clothes cause mummy wasn't at home just now.

Went out again just now, run under the rain, sis trying to hit me again. I think I got bruise over my arm already! She kicked me in front of daddy then daddy stopped her =D She's crazy, I cannot hit her but she can hit me.. Life's unfair ~

Currently very addicted to this korean drama, "Will it snow for christmas?" I love love the guy! So caring, sweet, romantic and loyal :) He loves the girl so much that he can let her go, by hurting her, because only that way, he can only make her totally felt so disappointed on him because he know, his existence is only giving her pain.. but does he really know what the girl wants? Guys are always like that, thinking what they're doing is right but never really bothered how the other feels.

"how many hearts will die tonight?" MINE, one & only. ;)

I'm feeling super hungry now! I wish I can cook really good foods and bake cookies and cakes! I wanna learn baking, wait till uncle's back, gonna force him to learn with me! And I'll be getting my camera soon! 5 more days =D whee!

I want this! CHOCO is love. :)

hehe, so cute! :D

I want this, rainbow colours (:

Tomorrow's the last day of school, should I be happy or not? Gonna be super lifeless, dots dots dots. But I've got 2 movies to watch, hope I don't get bored easily! :D

I haven't been updating the other blog, laziness strikes.. I'm gonna blog during the holidays. Cannot lazy, it's gonna be a surprise to someone I love (:

Today is 1st September, nice day. :D I hope this month is gonna be nice and exciting, no bad things will happen please, I don't need spoilers in my life! He said, it's gonna be 8/9/10 and 10/10/10 time 10:10:10 :D Only happens this year! Such a special date..

Blogger can check Stats already? I love!! :D

"The worst part about being lied to is knowing that you weren't worth the truth."

Insecure . Worried . Thinking a lot of nonsense . Jealousy . Imaginations . What more can it be.. From a picture, a word, anything, a girl, can imagine a lot of stuffs. Girls have wide range of imaginations.. how can you blame them? This is natural.. I've never felt like this before , so afraid that I'll lose something I actually cared a lot because I really can't stand the pain of losing someone I love..

/xx.

Over the line ;

2010-08-31T20:37:00.005+08:00

I don't know what's wrong with me, have been thinking a lot again.. Insecure and all those random feelings, I'm not even sure what am I worry about.. Why do we feel the pain only after we fall? Dots dots. I think what happened today makes my worries even worse..

This.. will try soon :D

Suits him! hor?xD

I think today is the most crappiest day ever. I got back Add Maths paper, don't even bother to do correction cause no meaning anymore.. dots dots. I will try try try try try x100 harder in Finals, I will :(

Then during Biology period, don't know what happen to teacher, suddenly bomb us. Then when she lectured us, she keeps looking at me only so I looked at her and keep nodding my head. I was trying not to laugh but then it's really funny and I turned around and laughed. And then she said.."bla bla bla, can you?" I said, "yes." Cause throughout the whole time, she's just looking at me only..

English period, busted.. Stayed back till really late cause of this case. I don't get why is she so stubborn but then, I don't know la. This teacher just.. I don't know how to say. Went to office, stayed there for like 15 minutes? Ah tiong also trying to help her but that teacher just won't let her go like that easily.. I hope she's okay :S

I went out the whole afternoon, went to another house. It's like a villa there, I wanna live there but then it's gonna be just a dream. I wanna go to a place where nobody knows me, and relax and chill, enjoy life to the max (Y) Shop and eat non stop.. Whee! I fight with my sister in there only, doing nothing, stayed there just to see if mummy needs our help (:

SH find me chat again? He is a bit crazy. No, it's impossible. I won't forget how he bully me last time! His my worst nightmare, ever.

Talking about dreams, I dreamt of something last night. A guy ... went to my house. I gave him drinks but then he act so cold towards me. He looks familiar, really familiar but I just can't remember who he is. I wonder what does this dream means..

till heres :)

/xx.

Running away from reality ;

2010-08-30T14:02:00.006+08:00

Dots dots dots, not gonna cry, holding back tears so badly while typing this post. Stupid sister keep crying in front of me like world's gonna end soon.. It's really sad to see someone whose with us for years left us and is not coming back anymore.. I must not cry.. You're strong, geekayhej :')

I can see that mummy is very upset with her leaving too.. She sat at the door for so long time.. I felt so weird without her too.. Like something's missing in this house. :( I think I will miss her foods a lot! I will miss complaining to her that I'm fat because of her good foods and she'll laugh at me! So now, who shall I complain to? Sigh. Good bye and have a safe flight... till here, tears still haven't fall. Hold it ;

I'm tired and hungry now. When I see books, my eyes felt so sleepy. I think I'm on holiday mood already.. I keep eating and daddy said, "You eat ler and eat non stop.. siao ah?" I say, "tummy hungry. not my fault.." Then daddy laughed. I kena suan everyday by daddy.

I'm gonna go do something to keep myself busy now, can't think a lot.. Sister is currently playing PSP while crying next to me.. She cried non stop since just now, so emotional.. I cry till used to it already, dots dots..

Who want watch sunset with me? :D

I agree (:

(L) this ~

Mich, I'm really very fascinated by your story ~ Only you can always give me surprises in life. Special hor you?xD Just an advice, for what had happen to you is really very kua zhang till even jane agree with me. I think you better think carefully before you decide :) I'm already an example for you, learn from my mistakes. HAHA! I think now your life is more complicated than mine now!

"Let her know you love her.. when all she wants is just a single "iloveyou" from you.." (:

/xx.

By your side ;

2010-08-29T10:21:00.003+08:00

I couldn't blog last night, my laptop was being a meanie to me. It doesn't want to connect itself to the connection so I couldn't chat and all.

It's 10:24am now and I'm awake already since just now. I just had a nightmare, my classmates are in this dream. It's scary!! :( I've been waking up so early this days.. Baby didn't believe I could wake up by myself! Hmph. I woke up early ends up watching tv alone! And whenever I'm alone, the tv will on off by itself continuosly.. and when I called my maid, it turns on again! And if I'm not alone, this "on off" incident never happen.

Then, during lunch, I told daddy about it. He said, "Scold the "thing" la.. Ask the "thing" to stop disturbing you and go away.." "Who so naughty come disturb my daugther ha??" HAHAHA! I don't feel scared lo for the first time but then when I think about it, I think it's scary now.

Yesterday, went out with 14 people to The Mall :) I went there early.. I walked alone and saw baby and Jasmond on the escalator so I went to find them. Then walked around and sat at Gelato. Saw lots of people pass by ~

We watched vampire sucks. Really sucks and I sibeh hate those violence parts.. And those disgusting scenes! Really disgusts me a lot.. When I predict something gross will happen, I turn away and hide ~ Baby thought those actors are the same ones from the real Twilight. I'm used to it, he never believes me =P

After movie, we went to dinner at Secret Recipe.. I didn't wanna stay till dinner one but nong kept asking me to stay so I stayed for dinner :D Baby's phone doodle jump! Nevermind, I'm used to it, I suck at playing games one. Lose in games, is such a common thing for me. Xi guan jiu hao :)

Baby accompanied me out, I left quite early.. When I reached home, got miss call. So baby reached home the same time as me! Coincidence ~

Cousins were at my house yesterday till night. Then uncle and aunt came, talked with mummy.. Dots dots.

I wanna go eat breakfast now :)

/xx.

Because of you

2010-08-26T16:06:00.003+08:00

My current favourite ;

I pick up the phone and I hear you on the line

You just don’t feel the same; it was all just a game

This is the end… This is the end…

Oh, not again

Am I not good enough? Did you even think twice?

Can you tell me where did things go wrong for us?

A part of me doesn’t want to let go

But you just don’t seem to care

Because of you, the tears fall endlessly inside

I can’t sleep, can’t do anything

All that is in my head

It’s you, it’s you, it’s you

Because of you, my heart breaks a lil’ more each day

I find it so hard to believe

You are truly gone

I cry, I cry, I cry because of you

How can I find the strength to go on like before?

How can I just pretend that it’s all okay?

I just lie to myself every day

But you just don’t seem to care

I just want to hate you so much

I just want to forget it all

But somehow, I still think of you (because I love you)

From the beginning to the end

You have never loved me

I was the fool all along

Because of you, I don’t know how to love again

I don’t know why you had to leave

All that is on my mind

It’s you, it’s you, it’s you

Because of you, all of my days are filled with rain

And you move on just like that

I can’t help myself

I cry, I cry, I cry because of you

sorrow ; depressed .

2010-08-26T15:44:00.004+08:00

I woke up late this morning, I rushed everything! My sister don't wanna wake me up! So I ate my breakfast in a rush too and I'm the last to go in car. Dots dots dots. I don't know why I just can't wake up by myself.

I was lying down on the table while listening to song in school.. erica and bohniang sitting next row were playing cards. They asked me, "What date is today?" Then I suddenly lift up my head, they shocked dao ~ FUNNNY DIE! And, I just remember, today is Thursday, duty day. I swept already then teacher ask me to sweep again! Bulainick laughed at me ==

POA POA POA. You made my heart beat rate increase, I can feel my heart racing so fast.. but I'm glad you didn't made me sad! :) Thanks for letting me pass POA. Nothing to happy about actually cause the number also not nice one. Physics, you won't let me down too right? Hope no fail or maybe I fail already? Miracle is needed a lots ;

I found this in twitter. Rainbow surrounding the sun, took me a few seconds to find.. can you see it? ;)

Maid is going back soon.. not coming back anymore. Daddy said, "Eh kwang fu zhe wash clothes." I smiled.. then daddy said, "aiyo kwang! ni zui hao xue how to xi yi fu ah ~ if not you big liao how leh?" I will learn soon okay! House chores should be easy de, right? Not self comforting ~

"If I could go back in time, I'd erase me from your mind, so that you don't have to feel any pain." I've hurt you already, it's a fact.. And I'm sorry.. Your status really.. I don't know why I keep stumble across your profile.. Just like what jane say, fate is a scary thing. Maybe, we should just be passer by in each other's life ; no other meanings.

I'm always hungry recently, my tummy is a monster :D

/xx.

I'm gonna run away ;

2010-08-25T15:13:00.004+08:00

Yesterday evening, I saw a full rainbow behind my house.. I watched the rainbow till it fade away. Slowly, it's gone. Rainbow makes me feel peaceful :)

the colour is so nice in reality.

taken upstairs.

some parts is covered by clouds. :)

the other part.

so nice :D

I love rainbow!

Peaceful ;

Rainbow (:

Then, I texted baby and asked him to see but he saw half of the rainbow only. Sad sad.. Baby has no fate with rainbow! xD

Today at school was okay. Received 2 subjects that I failed, dots dots. Double heart attack! POA and Physics, I don't hope high anymore, I lost all my confidence.. Chinese, I'm disappointed in you too. How could I make such silly mistakes? :(

Anyway, English period was scary. Aileen suddenly gone mad cause she said she heard somebody said "NO" and she lectured us, after that asking whose the one who said the "NO" but no one admits. And then, she called baby. HAHAHA! Then she asked me if I heard who said that. Kevin and I thinks that maybe there's another someone from the other world who said that beside teacher's ears :D

Then we went to library for the 2nd period of english. I kept teasing nong today! Nong, castle oh! Nong said she keep sa xiao the whole night after she knew what I told her last night. They were playing truth or dare. Baby is being a bai chi in the library! =)

And then, our ex classmate, Abigail came back to Brunei :D It's been 2 years since I've last seen her. I was shocked when I saw her walking towards us when I walked out of canteen with mich and jane. Something happened..

I turned around and saw him, he was looking at me. I immediately turn away.. No, guilty feelings can't kill me this time. Everything's clear now ; there's nothing more to say. Don't look at me that way. Mich agreed too, dots dots but she said, I'm the bad one for hurting him..

Uncle just finish chatting with me in skype. His gonna delay his flight back cause his girlfriend is going back to LA and she's scared to live alone there so his gonna come back later. Then, he said he tried to use the camera he bought already, it's nice. And I asked, "it's still mine ah?" He said, "yes, it's yours. very nice oh ~ I'm sure you will like it."

I love our blog :D

/xx.

I just want you to know.

2010-08-24T14:11:00.011+08:00

Got back papers again today, Biology, I'm disappointed in you! That one section, 7 marks, teacher only gave me 1 mark! Sad life.. Mummy wants me to go for Chemistry tuition, maybe starting from next month once dajie called the teacher. I want Physics too!! Add maths, letting me down once again :( English, I was shock with my marks, I was expecting it to be around 12 or 13 instead it was out of my expectations! Maybe I should expect all my marks to be low next time! JK.

Mummy just asked my results just now, I showed her all my papers, and she asked, "how many subjects you fail liao?" I said, "er.. haven't got all papers yet." I'm trying to hold back my tears so hard.. F, I wanna cancel you out of my life. If only I could, if I only I can..

Actually I was gonna movie whole afternoon today but then, the disc jane borrowed me, "You're Beautiful" has no subtitles one leh when I watched using my lappy! I don't understand a single thing they say. So I stopped watching. I'll watch tomorrow or maybe tomorrow's tomorrow since I haven't got disc 2 yet :D

He knew what's going on and decided to ignore me.. I think? If you think ignoring me, you'll feel much more better then go ahead ~ I'm sorry that I have to hurt you. I'll still treat you as a friend :) I stunned when you asked me that question.. after all, sorry. :(

I'll be blogging a lot of secrets at tumblr or maybe I'll blog at another blog of mine :D Baby, I wanna blog about us everyday at this another blog because you know, I'm forgetful ^^V

chocolate! yummy or not? it's a phone :D

Shell or Hell? :)

My current lullaby ;

我喜欢你的眼看着我的眼
我喜欢你的脸贴着我的脸

我喜欢你的手牵着我的手
我喜欢你的口吻着我的口
时间在改变你不要改变

因为我很爱你
不想要你放弃爱情
友情这段得来不易
我爱你真的是很爱你所以想
就这样继续爱下去

因为我很爱你
不想要你放弃爱情
友情这段得来不易
我爱你真的是很爱你所以想
就这样继续爱下去

; How could I bear a day without you by my side? I swear I'll go crazy missing you ;

I cut my fringe again. Daddy said I love to cut my fringe into one straight line, like coconut hair -_____-"

/xx.

Wo xi huan ;

2010-08-23T14:13:00.004+08:00

Currently messaging with love, facebook-ing and listening to the song he helped me downloaded yesterday, I love this song.. so much..

Anyway, I didn't get to blog yesterday was because I was lazy and and, HEHEHE, I was movie-ing the whole afternoon and skyping at night :) Jane created skype account already! Like finally. We can chat more often now since I don't really use MSN that often anymore (:

Sorry.. really.. although I know it's not my fault but yeah, you made me felt so guilty.. Sorry for not replying your message as I don't know how to say and what to tell you.. I don't wanna hurt someone so nice like you.. But why are you trying to make me feel like this? Mich reached school and the first thing she ask is, whether I talked to him already or not.. Jane said she saw him with a ... sad face, walking alone. I felt even more worse. I'd rather take all the pain by myself rather than hurting someone.

Like as if today's news to me weren't bad enough to pull me down. I hate the alphabet F. F = fail, fail means failure. I hate it =( I really don't know what's wrong with me.. I worked so hard and still.. even me, myself is starting to look down on myself now. =(

Disappointments ; I had enough of you .

I have super long hair =D

My fringe so fast grow long but my back hair won't, even jane said so. Why? I would rather my back hair grow faster and longer! I want long hair although it's super mafan and all. Wanna know why? Cause it takes a lot of time. Need to rinse it with water, put shampoo, wash, then put conditioner for a minute then wash. After that, I have to dry it with towel then dryer and then straighten it in the end. Like this also take almost around half an hour already. That's why sometimes I lazy to dry it.. LOL.

Baby, I love you. You know I do right? :)

Thanks for being so patient. <3

因为我很爱你，真的是很爱你所以不想你放弃爱情。

/xx.

feeling a little bit drowsy.

2010-08-21T17:08:00.005+08:00

Today, is the last day of test! In the car.. "yay! no stress ler!" daddy, "why? habis test liao ha?" me, "yeap.. today last day liao. can relax ler! " No more banging head on the car's window after school anymore! Too stress you know :P

love my hair here, whee ~ :D

I wanna sleep and movie non stop! I love this life so much, no need to study till late night anymore! No need to face books anymore! Relaxing (: Love, thanks for lending me the DVD, hate you! HEHEHE.

I'm stucked in this situation now. I find it really hard to tell him.. I don't wanna hurt him, but what should I do now? I keep telling mich I wanna bang wall and then she ask me to go ahead! T__T Wo hen fan and confused.. Really don't know how to say to him, it's too ... =S

Anyway, just now went out with mummy again to accompany her although I'm sibeh tired. Everytime I planned to do something sure got something will spoiled my plan one, FML. So I went out with her to Gadong to buy present for sis's friend then drop my sis at her friend's house and went to uncle's shop. Uncle complained that my cousin (guy) has a lot of girlfriends recently.

When he say, I immediately laugh out loud ~ FUNNY DIE LO. He say, when he go pick my cousin from school, he one guy surrounded by 5 girls. I go stalk my cousin's facebook just now and saw a lot of y7s girl on his page. So now I know why the y8s girls behsong y7s's girls liao ~ Then my uncle say my aunt tell my cousin, "if you don't like the girl, let her know.. just be friends. don't hurt people feelings and make the girl heartbroken." Then, I was laughing non stop. LOL. So in conclusion, they think that my cousin's gonna be playboy for sure when he grows up.

Physics, 65 is enough :D Although I know I lost 14 marks already.. I tried to do and I was right but then I got a very very unique answer therefore I think it's wrong and I didn't wrote it down. I'm not aiming high, please let me pass all subjects, please?

I wanna cut my fringe again. I think it's weird lah.. But it's short now, gonna cut shorter?xD Every morning see also will angry, I don't know why. Having long hair is very very mafan ~ Morning takes such a long time to fix my hair.. dots dots.

Tonight, facial mask treatment! :D My skin.. is so dry, it's dehydrated due to late night sleeping. Mmm, strawberry flavour smell (:

0820 ; till now when I think, it's still like a dream to me. Am I dreaming? It feels so not real..

kthxbye.

/xx.

Geeeee's.

2010-08-19T17:30:00.002+08:00

Add maths, hoping can pass, didn't have enough time to finish, god bless? Let me pass please! I'll love you :) I work so hard liao okay, so please don't make my effort seems so worthless..

I'm having a headache now. :(

It's such a nice weather to sleep but I'm having tuition tonight. I wanted to nap in the afternoon cause I was so tired but mummy asked me to go out with her, she said, "wo yi ge ren, hen boring de leh.." so I went out with her.

Thailand during September? I wanna follow! But but, they're going for a serious thing not for fun but still, they can shop leh! Can I follow? I can take care of myself leh :D I think?

Got back Malay paper, not satisfy, ringkasan baby, how could you let me down like this? I told mummy then she say, "shi zhe yang de la.. form 4 de standard bu yi yang liao.. ni xie de bu gou hao.. okay la.." cause I told her lots of people got 50+, an excuse for me to escape. Biology, it's nearly my turn but the bell rang..

Tomorrow going to KB learn physics, hope can pass this time with good marks :)

12 more days ; can't wait till 31st of August (:

kthxbye.

; “Happy thought. I am somebody’s reason to smile. I am somebody’s happiness.”

; “Please don’t talk to me I fall in love so easily.”

; "You make me smile even when you're the main reason why I'm sad."

; "Maybe I'm just scared to say that I'm falling for you.."

/xx.